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It's one thing to know this, but another to actually feel it. For a variety of reasons, I get quite bad paranoia sometimes that nobody actually likes me. I fee

It's one thing to know this, but another to actually feel it. For a variety of reasons, I get quite bad paranoia sometimes that nobody actually likes me. I feel like at best they tolerate me, and at worst are using me. It's a really shitty feeling to feel. It's caused me to drift away from a lot of friendships because I think "they don't really like me", and then months or years later, I run into them and they ask me why I drifted away. It took me quite a lot of time to come to terms with the fact that it's just my brain fucking with me. I still can't shake the feeling sometimes, but at least I can recognise it and work around it. It's a weird cognitive dissonance to have, to know that all your friends like you and enjoy your company, but at the same time feeling like a piece of shit that nobody wants to be around.

hfdgiutdryg 8y ago
Sounds like some combination of low-grade depression and anxiety. It's not helped by modern society generally not expressing gratitude or affection for each other. What you're feeling is pretty common.
toxik 8y ago
I get that feeling and I think it may be true sometimes. I had this especially with my childhood friends when we grew older, I felt like somehow I didn’t really count unless I had something to bring them. So I left for greener pastures. Worked great for me, I’d rather be alone than pretend to be liked.
- ghostbrainalpha 8y ago
  If you don't like yourself, and you assume that others would be rational in not liking you as well, it is very easy to project those feelings onto them. I would also rather be alone than have pretend relationships. But make sure you really know what is happening. Because projecting your self hate is a much more common problem than being surrounded by actors. In fact if you already know that you dislike your self, it is almost certainly what is going on.
  - toxik 8y ago
    Absolutely, you teach others how to treat you with your actions -- but that applies more to new acquaintances than old friends you made before you were even really a person (i.e. childhood friends.) I'd say I like myself a little too much today, to a point of it nearing complacency. I think that group was just kind of negative and standing on each other, it happens.
Micoloth 8y ago
Yes, this. r/2meirl4meirl
jimkri 8y ago
This happened to me a lot when I was younger, it still happens now but not as much. I'm thankful for friends that noticed I was retreating a little and would go out of their way to invite me to hang out, or just bring me out of my shell.
tajen 8y ago
I blame it on speaking to a computer all day long – inert machine. When I worked as a woodworker (backpacking), I had none of this lack of confidence in others.

hfdgiutdryg 8y ago

Sounds like some combination of low-grade depression and anxiety. It's not helped by modern society generally not expressing gratitude or affection for each other. What you're feeling is pretty common.

toxik 8y ago

I get that feeling and I think it may be true sometimes. I had this especially with my childhood friends when we grew older, I felt like somehow I didn’t really count unless I had something to bring them. So I left for greener pastures. Worked great for me, I’d rather be alone than pretend to be liked.

ghostbrainalpha 8y ago
If you don't like yourself, and you assume that others would be rational in not liking you as well, it is very easy to project those feelings onto them. I would also rather be alone than have pretend relationships. But make sure you really know what is happening. Because projecting your self hate is a much more common problem than being surrounded by actors. In fact if you already know that you dislike your self, it is almost certainly what is going on.
- toxik 8y ago
  Absolutely, you teach others how to treat you with your actions -- but that applies more to new acquaintances than old friends you made before you were even really a person (i.e. childhood friends.) I'd say I like myself a little too much today, to a point of it nearing complacency. I think that group was just kind of negative and standing on each other, it happens.

Micoloth 8y ago

Yes, this. r/2meirl4meirl

jimkri 8y ago

This happened to me a lot when I was younger, it still happens now but not as much. I'm thankful for friends that noticed I was retreating a little and would go out of their way to invite me to hang out, or just bring me out of my shell.

tajen 8y ago

I blame it on speaking to a computer all day long – inert machine. When I worked as a woodworker (backpacking), I had none of this lack of confidence in others.