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I've been married about 19 years, and I think I'm clear on what you're saying. But I haven't heard it put quite this way. Can you cite some concrete examples

• umvi 8y ago
  Person A is religious and values spiritual growth. Person A wants their kids to believe in God and develop spiritually. Person B is atheist and thinks religion is a crock. Person B wants their kids to reject religion and flush spirituality down the toilet. Person B is willing to let A go to church on Sundays to make the relationship work since B is attracted to A. But there will probably be big problems with this over time, especially if kids come into the picture.
• rayiner 8y ago
  > Can you cite some concrete examples of these values, and, perhaps, common ways that an otherwise seemingly compatible couple might not share them? Thanks. A friend of mine's wife once said to him, about planning some extended vacation despite his busy schedule: "if you loved me you'd make time!" Between my wife and I, this is a punchline. But for many perfectly reasonable people it would be a sincere request worthy of fulfillment. A couple having different reactions to this statement could mean a lot of resentment built-up over time.