I don’t know if this would apply to you. Your story sounds similar to mine, so I’ll share what I did, just in case. I also apologize in advance if this does not

I don’t know if this would apply to you. Your story sounds similar to mine, so I’ll share what I did, just in case. I also apologize in advance if this does not apply. That said, I found my depression was a direct result of consuming depressants. Alcohol, weed, anything else I could get my hands on. Suicidal ideation was the order of the day. I got clean almost 23 years ago with the help of a 12-Step program. It sounds like an odd choice for an Atheist like myself. But it was absolutely the best thing I ever did for myself. I’d really like to tell you my life is a bowl of cherries all day every day. But that would be a lie. I do have a life that I was incapable of envisioning for myself. I am married, I am a dad and I’m pursuing my dream building my own company. I’m completely in love with my wife and my nine-year-old daughter. I get to feel a wide range of emotions. Every day. I get to be present for everything. I get to participate in every decision in my life, instead of living life by the default settings. And I get to be responsible for every one of those choices. It is freedom for my mind, my heart, and my body.