full time engine mechanic here. ASE certified and everything...ive been doing it for 15 years. Some days are worse than others, like when im coming back from

full time engine mechanic here. ASE certified and everything...ive been doing it for 15 years. Some days are worse than others, like when im coming back from a 3 day weekend full of cadillac margaritas and over-grilled burgers...but nothing like what you describe. When I think 'mentally damaged' im picturing someone who sticks their hand in a running engine to 'feel if the belts are moving ok.' You're doing pretty good from what I can tell, but ever since I started checking out HN ive seen quite a few people in tech that feel the same way you do. Is it offices that do this? nobody I know in my office ever seems really happy in the morning. seems like sitting around all day staring at a computer might start to eat away at a mans soul. If money isnt an issue, I'd suggest spending time learning a trade as a hobby or maybe more. maybe pick up a shift changing oil at a local shop, and see how that grabs you. Im not saying its the easiest thing in the world, but the job is pretty social and even though your shoulders and arms ache after the first day, you never feel like you arent doing something useful.