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For a swath of business responsibilities, this "phantom legal risk" is the Most Available Excuse (TM). We see Most Available Excuses in product feedback ("it's

by shimon 8y ago

For a swath of business responsibilities, this "phantom legal risk" is the Most Available Excuse (TM). We see Most Available Excuses in product feedback ("it's too hard to use" is easier to say than "I didn't see how this would help me accomplish anything I actually care about"), in social engagements ("sorry, too busy this week"), and many other areas. I'm a natural skeptic so I maintain a mental set of Most Available Excuses, and when I hear one I treat it as a dodge, not an answer. Why don't they want to do it? How might I make them more comfortable with me so they can explain how they really feel?

tajen 8y ago
Except when it’s really the reason for not saying. Should I tell my 48 candidates that I didn’t take them because they’re foreigners and I don’t want to do the visa parkour? Is it illegal to select on this criteria? Do I want the antiracism unions on my back? Ok let’s tell them a generic reason. Here again, the legal excuse is the genuine reason for not telling. PS: my first employee is already a foreigner, so don’t lecture me on racism.
chongli 8y ago
Why don't they want to do it? How might I make them more comfortable with me so they can explain how they really feel? I'd be very cautious with this approach. Politeness is an extremely important social defense mechanism for most people. By ignoring the standard polite response and trying to get at the truth you're undermining a person's attempt to save face. By doing so, you're attacking their autonomy and agency as a human being.
- shimon 8y ago
  I'm not suggesting directly asking these questions of the other person. I'm suggesting these as topics for you to think about if you're getting the polite excuse and want the actual reason. To get that you have to actually make them more comfortable; calling them out on a polite lie obviously isn't going to do that.

by shimon 8y ago

tajen 8y ago

Except when it’s really the reason for not saying. Should I tell my 48 candidates that I didn’t take them because they’re foreigners and I don’t want to do the visa parkour? Is it illegal to select on this criteria? Do I want the antiracism unions on my back? Ok let’s tell them a generic reason. Here again, the legal excuse is the genuine reason for not telling. PS: my first employee is already a foreigner, so don’t lecture me on racism.

chongli 8y ago

Why don't they want to do it? How might I make them more comfortable with me so they can explain how they really feel? I'd be very cautious with this approach. Politeness is an extremely important social defense mechanism for most people. By ignoring the standard polite response and trying to get at the truth you're undermining a person's attempt to save face. By doing so, you're attacking their autonomy and agency as a human being.

shimon 8y ago
I'm not suggesting directly asking these questions of the other person. I'm suggesting these as topics for you to think about if you're getting the polite excuse and want the actual reason. To get that you have to actually make them more comfortable; calling them out on a polite lie obviously isn't going to do that.