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> The phrase most directly means “(I) am loving (you),” as if to convey that love is an active labor, not just an amorphous feeling tossed between two parties.

> The phrase most directly means “(I) am loving (you),” as if to convey that love is an active labor, not just an amorphous feeling tossed between two parties. I really connect with this. In the west, love seems to be this thing you cannot control. It can come upon you suddenly and leave you just as suddenly. In that context, "love" is a scary thing. It seems to have a mind of it's own. Truly, I don't believe that it's love at all, but usually either lust or infatuation in disguise. I believe whole heartedly that "love" is always an act. You can say you "love" someone while actively doing things that prove you do not love them. Likewise, you can actively show someone love without saying anything to them. True love is a controlled action and is accompanied by feelings (at least at times), but it does not have to be. Perhaps the Japanese got this completely right.

ReverseCold 8y ago
> Perhaps the Japanese got this completely right. You can't just say that and then not elaborate :) Edit: Oops, didn't read the article.
- c22 8y ago
  Gp was probably assuming an audience who had read the article. From the article: In Japanese, the phrase “I love you” exists linguistically, but does not exist culturally. Linguistically, it is best translated as 愛してる or Aishiteru. Unlike English, it does not contain the “I” and “you” involved in “I love you”; instead, the “I” is implicit, belonging to the speaker only in assumption, as is the “you.” The phrase most directly means “(I) am loving (you),” as if to convey that love is an active labor, not just an amorphous feeling tossed between two parties.
- DoreenMichele 8y ago
  In English, we have a lot of confusion because the word love is both a very and a noun. The verb describes acting in a deeply caring fashion. The noun describe a feeling. This is why we can have song lines like "Are you going to stay with the one who loves you? Or are you going back to the one you love?" Very often, when someone says "I love you" they mean "I have strong feelings because you are good to me." They don't necessarily mean "So I intend to be good to you." It's often a pretty parasitic pronouncement. /cynic
pertymcpert 8y ago
I can disprove that with a counterexample. I love my wife. It's a feeling I have within my chest, but it's not infatuation which fades after a few months. It really is an amorphous feeling that's deeply rooted. And yes that might make it scary, but that's the reality.
JdeBP 8y ago
> In the west The people in this very discussion pointing out differences and difficulties translating between English and French, Spanish, and (Ancient) Greek should disabuse one of the notion that this is some "Western" thing.

ReverseCold 8y ago

> Perhaps the Japanese got this completely right. You can't just say that and then not elaborate :) Edit: Oops, didn't read the article.

c22 8y ago
Gp was probably assuming an audience who had read the article. From the article: In Japanese, the phrase “I love you” exists linguistically, but does not exist culturally. Linguistically, it is best translated as 愛してる or Aishiteru. Unlike English, it does not contain the “I” and “you” involved in “I love you”; instead, the “I” is implicit, belonging to the speaker only in assumption, as is the “you.” The phrase most directly means “(I) am loving (you),” as if to convey that love is an active labor, not just an amorphous feeling tossed between two parties.
DoreenMichele 8y ago
In English, we have a lot of confusion because the word love is both a very and a noun. The verb describes acting in a deeply caring fashion. The noun describe a feeling. This is why we can have song lines like "Are you going to stay with the one who loves you? Or are you going back to the one you love?" Very often, when someone says "I love you" they mean "I have strong feelings because you are good to me." They don't necessarily mean "So I intend to be good to you." It's often a pretty parasitic pronouncement. /cynic

pertymcpert 8y ago

I can disprove that with a counterexample. I love my wife. It's a feeling I have within my chest, but it's not infatuation which fades after a few months. It really is an amorphous feeling that's deeply rooted. And yes that might make it scary, but that's the reality.

JdeBP 8y ago

> In the west The people in this very discussion pointing out differences and difficulties translating between English and French, Spanish, and (Ancient) Greek should disabuse one of the notion that this is some "Western" thing.