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I went in 2010 and one of the first people I met there was an advertising exec who said this event was the only time she felt alive. It was really sad.

by zasz 8y ago

forgottenpass 8y ago
Hey, at least she has one in her life. That's one more per year than most people. I'm not trying to pick an argument, or imply most people are emotionally dead inside, but _come on_. You really gotta take an expression about enjoying an escaping from the humdrum of day-to-day life and use it to snark about a person's entire existence?
- zasz 8y ago
  It wasn't intended to be snark. She was very clear that this one week was IT for her. She was a leader in an established Burning Man camp that hands out free stuff for women's health, and she said she really enjoyed the recognition she got for doing something nice for other people. At the time I thought she should look into doing volunteer work with some worthy organization the rest of the year, but now, I see that finding a satisfying community to give value to isn't so easy. What's sad is that for all the technological progress this society has made, it has failed to provide people with consistent opportunities to feel that they are doing psychologically meaningful work.
com2kid 8y ago
Why is that sad? She found something she enjoys doing. Better than someone who has yet to find that spark that gives life meaning. Is everyone in the advertising business supposed to love making adverts? I certainly feel more alive camping with friends than I do debugging JavaScript. I'm lucky enough to have a life where I can go on 2 or 3 major vacations a year with friends and family with another couple smaller trips spread throughout the year. For people with a busier schedule, I can see them taking great pleasure in the one time a year they get to escape. Especially since so many people never get to escape. I know plenty of people who never have had a vacation, and may very well die without ever having a day off from work and life and stress.
- jdietrich 8y ago
  If you're an advertising executive or a software developer and decide that you'd be happier living in the desert and making weird sculptures from scrap, that is very much an option. Living in a cabin in the woods or sailing around the world or establishing a commune for circus artists is a thing that you can do, and you don't need to be a millionaire to do it.
  - marnett 8y ago
    is it possible you have any tips on the circus commune?
    - ramses0 8y ago
      wwoof + circus turns up something in oregon. Investigate if you're interested.
  - theossuary 8y ago
    I don't think you know how expensive it would be to sail around the world. Especially if you'd like to do it somewhat comfortably.
    - barbs 8y ago
      Not necessarily https://vimeo.com/15351476 https://vimeo.com/15351476
    - fizx 8y ago
      Sailing around the Mediterranean, then selling your boat two years later and sailing around the Caribbean, then doing it again somewhere else is easily within the reach of middle-class finances. Having a boat and crew large enough, comfortable and capable enough to sail the open ocean is really the hard part, but you can get most of the pleasure while avoiding that.
    - krrrh 8y ago
      Someone I know well wanted to sail around the world. Learned to sail, and she got to know people with boats who needed crew to take shifts on their sailboards, and were headed somewhere interesting. Then she would repeat the process at the next port. There are also forums for connecting people in this manner. She always got food on board, and sometimes paid a stipend at the end of the trip. After a year and a half of adventure in dream locales I don't think she was out-of-pocket more than a four figure sum. Certainty, and minimizing risk is expensive, but accepting the opposite can open up a lot of opportunities.
gist 8y ago
> I went in 2010 and one of the first people > I met there was an advertising exec who said > this event was the only time she felt alive. > It was really sad. I can't decide if what she said is 'virtue signaling'[1] or 'humble bragging' [2] It's obviously a dig at the professions that she has either chosen or can't escape from and it kind of smacks of 'anyone doing this is really lame and has no value but at least I recognize that and therefore I am a good person'. Also reminds me a bit of when people apologize about being an attorney. [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virtue_signalling https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virtue_signalling [2] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201803/why-people-hate-humblebragging https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/...
peterwwillis 8y ago
Luckily, this isn't all the attendees, but for the repeat ones, yeah. It is sad. They say things like they're "home" when they're at a burn, and they literally get depressed for a week back in the "default world". The fact that these people seem completely incapable of understanding how to live the life they want more than 1 week a year is astounding. If you want to be naked, spin fire, drink and do drugs with your friends while listening to mixes of house and world music, get a back yard with a tall fence and go to town.
- ISL 8y ago
  A lot of people work in order to live on their vacations.
  - Joe-Z 8y ago
    This has to be one of the more depressive sentences I've read. More and more I find myself being really glad that I work in software, where flexible working hours and companies that try to offer something to their employees (because there's actual competition) are more common than in many other fields I guess.
- beaconstudios 8y ago
  > They say things like they're "home" when they're at a burn, and they literally get depressed for a week back in the "default world". That's probably the MDMA comedown, to be honest.
  - peterwwillis 8y ago
    Not exactly. It's a different kind of chemical comedown, similar to what's called "drop" in the bdsm world. People get so excited about finally doing what they love with people who accept them, and then the actual excitement of doing those things spins off lots of natural chemical highs. When they have to leave they're both depressed in general that they have to leave those things/people behind, and then also have a drop off of those natural "high" chemicals. It's common for people who leave non-drug-related conferences or weekend-long parties to be affected by it, for up to a week or more.
funfunfun 8y ago
I love this story. It captures my experiences there.

I went in 2010 and one of the first people I met there was an advertising exec who said this event was the only time she felt alive. It was really sad.

by zasz 8y ago

I went in 2010 and one of the first people I met there was an advertising exec who said this event was the only time she felt alive. It was really sad.

forgottenpass 8y ago

Hey, at least she has one in her life. That's one more per year than most people. I'm not trying to pick an argument, or imply most people are emotionally dead inside, but _come on_. You really gotta take an expression about enjoying an escaping from the humdrum of day-to-day life and use it to snark about a person's entire existence?

zasz 8y ago
It wasn't intended to be snark. She was very clear that this one week was IT for her. She was a leader in an established Burning Man camp that hands out free stuff for women's health, and she said she really enjoyed the recognition she got for doing something nice for other people. At the time I thought she should look into doing volunteer work with some worthy organization the rest of the year, but now, I see that finding a satisfying community to give value to isn't so easy. What's sad is that for all the technological progress this society has made, it has failed to provide people with consistent opportunities to feel that they are doing psychologically meaningful work.

com2kid 8y ago

Why is that sad? She found something she enjoys doing. Better than someone who has yet to find that spark that gives life meaning. Is everyone in the advertising business supposed to love making adverts? I certainly feel more alive camping with friends than I do debugging JavaScript. I'm lucky enough to have a life where I can go on 2 or 3 major vacations a year with friends and family with another couple smaller trips spread throughout the year. For people with a busier schedule, I can see them taking great pleasure in the one time a year they get to escape. Especially since so many people never get to escape. I know plenty of people who never have had a vacation, and may very well die without ever having a day off from work and life and stress.

jdietrich 8y ago
If you're an advertising executive or a software developer and decide that you'd be happier living in the desert and making weird sculptures from scrap, that is very much an option. Living in a cabin in the woods or sailing around the world or establishing a commune for circus artists is a thing that you can do, and you don't need to be a millionaire to do it.
- marnett 8y ago
  is it possible you have any tips on the circus commune?
  - ramses0 8y ago
    wwoof + circus turns up something in oregon. Investigate if you're interested.
- theossuary 8y ago
  I don't think you know how expensive it would be to sail around the world. Especially if you'd like to do it somewhat comfortably.
  - barbs 8y ago
    Not necessarily https://vimeo.com/15351476 https://vimeo.com/15351476
  - fizx 8y ago
    Sailing around the Mediterranean, then selling your boat two years later and sailing around the Caribbean, then doing it again somewhere else is easily within the reach of middle-class finances. Having a boat and crew large enough, comfortable and capable enough to sail the open ocean is really the hard part, but you can get most of the pleasure while avoiding that.
  - krrrh 8y ago
    Someone I know well wanted to sail around the world. Learned to sail, and she got to know people with boats who needed crew to take shifts on their sailboards, and were headed somewhere interesting. Then she would repeat the process at the next port. There are also forums for connecting people in this manner. She always got food on board, and sometimes paid a stipend at the end of the trip. After a year and a half of adventure in dream locales I don't think she was out-of-pocket more than a four figure sum. Certainty, and minimizing risk is expensive, but accepting the opposite can open up a lot of opportunities.

gist 8y ago

> I went in 2010 and one of the first people > I met there was an advertising exec who said > this event was the only time she felt alive. > It was really sad. I can't decide if what she said is 'virtue signaling'[1] or 'humble bragging' [2] It's obviously a dig at the professions that she has either chosen or can't escape from and it kind of smacks of 'anyone doing this is really lame and has no value but at least I recognize that and therefore I am a good person'. Also reminds me a bit of when people apologize about being an attorney. [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virtue_signalling https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virtue_signalling [2] https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201803/why-people-hate-humblebragging https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/fulfillment-any-age/...

peterwwillis 8y ago

Luckily, this isn't all the attendees, but for the repeat ones, yeah. It is sad. They say things like they're "home" when they're at a burn, and they literally get depressed for a week back in the "default world". The fact that these people seem completely incapable of understanding how to live the life they want more than 1 week a year is astounding. If you want to be naked, spin fire, drink and do drugs with your friends while listening to mixes of house and world music, get a back yard with a tall fence and go to town.

ISL 8y ago
A lot of people work in order to live on their vacations.
- Joe-Z 8y ago
  This has to be one of the more depressive sentences I've read. More and more I find myself being really glad that I work in software, where flexible working hours and companies that try to offer something to their employees (because there's actual competition) are more common than in many other fields I guess.
beaconstudios 8y ago
> They say things like they're "home" when they're at a burn, and they literally get depressed for a week back in the "default world". That's probably the MDMA comedown, to be honest.
- peterwwillis 8y ago
  Not exactly. It's a different kind of chemical comedown, similar to what's called "drop" in the bdsm world. People get so excited about finally doing what they love with people who accept them, and then the actual excitement of doing those things spins off lots of natural chemical highs. When they have to leave they're both depressed in general that they have to leave those things/people behind, and then also have a drop off of those natural "high" chemicals. It's common for people who leave non-drug-related conferences or weekend-long parties to be affected by it, for up to a week or more.

funfunfun 8y ago

I love this story. It captures my experiences there.