4 ms·

We're expecting our first in December. Is it really like that? Don't scare me man, I have big plans!

by Keyframe 8y ago

bovermyer 8y ago
Children, big plans, or sleep. Pick two.
- ztoben 8y ago
  From my experience having children and sleep isn't even always an option ;)
- bluGill 8y ago
  Children are big plans. You don't get to pick sleep, and you don't get any other big plan. Fortunately Children for all their work are rewarding. You won't grow as much at work. However you get to see and do many interesting things in return. If you are lucky you can get your kids interested in your hobbies (this isn't that hard) One reason to never become CEO: they travel 200 days/year and thus don't get to see their kids much - at less than $10 million/year they are grossly underpaid for the time away from family.
eismcc 8y ago
One is a lot easier than two
swalsh 8y ago
When the kids are at daycare, you'll get 8 hours a day at work to do your work. One of the hardest challenges I had to overcome after becoming a parent is learning to get everything I need to get done actually done in those 8 hours. But it's going to be hard, you'll have less sleep. Sometimes I stare at the monitor and my head is so cloudy I have no idea what I need to get done. To add stress, your younger coworkers are going to be working 10-12 hrs a day, and will probably be more productive than you. You'll look bad, and you'll feel worse. At about 3 years of age, things start to get better. Of course that's when my second was born :(
- cavanasm 8y ago
  As someone who probably qualifies in the "younger coworker" category, I'd be irritated if there was any level of expectation that I worked 10-12 hours a day, unless I wasn't working 5 days a week.
  - grawprog 8y ago
    I end up working ten hours a day some days, not every day, but I also work 6 days a week most weeks. My coworker with two kids works probably more overtime than me, usually 9 hours at least every week day then most Saturdays. His wife doesn't work or drive and his parents live with them and don't work or drive. He ends up spending just about all his free time running his family around to different appointments and things. I honestly don't know how he stays so cheerful all the time. He's only about 4 or 5 years older than me(I'm 30). But, that's what the culture's like where he's from though I suppose. He's been here for about ten years and spent just about all his time working to bring his family over and then support him. He impresses the hell out of me, though, i'm glad I don't have to do that.
    - Skunkleton 8y ago
      > I end up working ten hours a day some days, not every day, but I also work 6 days a week most weeks. Why? Do you like this?
      - grawprog 8y ago
        Sometimes I do, and the overtime pay definitely helps. There's a few reasons. We have a schedule to maintain. We have a certain number of jobs that need to be finished every day, if we can't finish everything we have to stay. Right now there's only me and two other people properly trained to do our jobs and each of us work in different sections. One of the jobs is manageable by one person, my job and the the other guy's job are two person jobs. Right now me and one guy have a couple new guys helping us who don't really know what to do and can't really be left to do a lot unsupervised. Each of us also relies on the person before us completing our jobs on time. I'm right in the middle of the process, so if I don't finish everything I need to the people that come after me have to work even harder to finish everything on time. If we're even a couple hours late for a job, customers complain, contractors cancel jobs and the boss is unhappy. I personally don't like burdening my coworkers more than I have to and honestly we do high quality work, I like knowing my work is well done. We're a small place, we all work together to get things done. The boss puts in his time with everyone he's probably the last one to leave at night treats his employees well. Anything we need anytime to get our jobs done he'll get it for us right away, if we've ever got problems in life or other things he's understanding and tries to accommodate or help out as best he can, they've taught me so many things since i've started here and everybody was patient while I learned and at this point the shop relies on me to be there to do my job. Oh and my boss is one of the few people I know I can honestly say is a hero. He rescued is family from genocide by the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia in the 70's when he was in his 20's, escaped to China then brought them all to Canada and started his business with nothing. So the way I see it, I can't really complain to much about having to work hard or long hours, i've never had to deal with watching my friends and family get lined up and executed with an axe to the skull. And honestly, I just enjoy my job. I get to make things everyday, I program, I do physical work, operate and maintain giant machines, I get to be creative and i'm pretty much left to do whatever I want as long as i get my job done. Plus it's pretty cool to work making things from one of the earliest materials shaped by humans.
cybrjoe 8y ago
We have two and my wife is lucky enough to stay home with them (and not need daycare). One thing I didn't account for is the load parenting all day places on the spouse staying home. In a perfect world you could share the load 50/50 after work, but on good days it's probably 60% on me to parent in the evenings. A bad day can mean I'm 100% on parenting duty. I'm sure everyone's mileage (and relationships) differ here.
- TheCycoONE 8y ago
  This is very true in my family as well and seems seldom talked about. I've been on both sides of it because I work M-F and my wife works Saturday. If we can get out to the playground or something it's lovely, but on a bad day stuck in the house she can't come home soon enough and I am done.
hyeomans 8y ago
It takes a toll, but it's worth it man. Drink a lot of water!
- Keyframe 8y ago
  Kid IS the big plan then!

We're expecting our first in December. Is it really like that? Don't scare me man, I have big plans!

bovermyer 8y ago

Children, big plans, or sleep. Pick two.

ztoben 8y ago
From my experience having children and sleep isn't even always an option ;)
bluGill 8y ago
Children are big plans. You don't get to pick sleep, and you don't get any other big plan. Fortunately Children for all their work are rewarding. You won't grow as much at work. However you get to see and do many interesting things in return. If you are lucky you can get your kids interested in your hobbies (this isn't that hard) One reason to never become CEO: they travel 200 days/year and thus don't get to see their kids much - at less than $10 million/year they are grossly underpaid for the time away from family.

eismcc 8y ago

One is a lot easier than two

swalsh 8y ago

When the kids are at daycare, you'll get 8 hours a day at work to do your work. One of the hardest challenges I had to overcome after becoming a parent is learning to get everything I need to get done actually done in those 8 hours. But it's going to be hard, you'll have less sleep. Sometimes I stare at the monitor and my head is so cloudy I have no idea what I need to get done. To add stress, your younger coworkers are going to be working 10-12 hrs a day, and will probably be more productive than you. You'll look bad, and you'll feel worse. At about 3 years of age, things start to get better. Of course that's when my second was born :(

cavanasm 8y ago
As someone who probably qualifies in the "younger coworker" category, I'd be irritated if there was any level of expectation that I worked 10-12 hours a day, unless I wasn't working 5 days a week.
- grawprog 8y ago
  I end up working ten hours a day some days, not every day, but I also work 6 days a week most weeks. My coworker with two kids works probably more overtime than me, usually 9 hours at least every week day then most Saturdays. His wife doesn't work or drive and his parents live with them and don't work or drive. He ends up spending just about all his free time running his family around to different appointments and things. I honestly don't know how he stays so cheerful all the time. He's only about 4 or 5 years older than me(I'm 30). But, that's what the culture's like where he's from though I suppose. He's been here for about ten years and spent just about all his time working to bring his family over and then support him. He impresses the hell out of me, though, i'm glad I don't have to do that.
  - Skunkleton 8y ago
    > I end up working ten hours a day some days, not every day, but I also work 6 days a week most weeks. Why? Do you like this?
    - grawprog 8y ago
      Sometimes I do, and the overtime pay definitely helps. There's a few reasons. We have a schedule to maintain. We have a certain number of jobs that need to be finished every day, if we can't finish everything we have to stay. Right now there's only me and two other people properly trained to do our jobs and each of us work in different sections. One of the jobs is manageable by one person, my job and the the other guy's job are two person jobs. Right now me and one guy have a couple new guys helping us who don't really know what to do and can't really be left to do a lot unsupervised. Each of us also relies on the person before us completing our jobs on time. I'm right in the middle of the process, so if I don't finish everything I need to the people that come after me have to work even harder to finish everything on time. If we're even a couple hours late for a job, customers complain, contractors cancel jobs and the boss is unhappy. I personally don't like burdening my coworkers more than I have to and honestly we do high quality work, I like knowing my work is well done. We're a small place, we all work together to get things done. The boss puts in his time with everyone he's probably the last one to leave at night treats his employees well. Anything we need anytime to get our jobs done he'll get it for us right away, if we've ever got problems in life or other things he's understanding and tries to accommodate or help out as best he can, they've taught me so many things since i've started here and everybody was patient while I learned and at this point the shop relies on me to be there to do my job. Oh and my boss is one of the few people I know I can honestly say is a hero. He rescued is family from genocide by the Khmer Rouge in Cambodia in the 70's when he was in his 20's, escaped to China then brought them all to Canada and started his business with nothing. So the way I see it, I can't really complain to much about having to work hard or long hours, i've never had to deal with watching my friends and family get lined up and executed with an axe to the skull. And honestly, I just enjoy my job. I get to make things everyday, I program, I do physical work, operate and maintain giant machines, I get to be creative and i'm pretty much left to do whatever I want as long as i get my job done. Plus it's pretty cool to work making things from one of the earliest materials shaped by humans.

cybrjoe 8y ago

We have two and my wife is lucky enough to stay home with them (and not need daycare). One thing I didn't account for is the load parenting all day places on the spouse staying home. In a perfect world you could share the load 50/50 after work, but on good days it's probably 60% on me to parent in the evenings. A bad day can mean I'm 100% on parenting duty. I'm sure everyone's mileage (and relationships) differ here.

TheCycoONE 8y ago
This is very true in my family as well and seems seldom talked about. I've been on both sides of it because I work M-F and my wife works Saturday. If we can get out to the playground or something it's lovely, but on a bad day stuck in the house she can't come home soon enough and I am done.

hyeomans 8y ago

It takes a toll, but it's worth it man. Drink a lot of water!

Keyframe 8y ago
Kid IS the big plan then!