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What happened to Katie is super sad, but hundreds of thousands of people get dumped and cheated on every year without shooting themselves. I totally understand

What happened to Katie is super sad, but hundreds of thousands of people get dumped and cheated on every year without shooting themselves. I totally understand your feelings, because I also worry for my children. But I also try to do a few things: 1. Try to help my kids keep things in perspective. Don't hide the risk of pain and failure from them. Instead, warn them that such things will happen, and try to teach resilience. 2. Watch out for signs of depression in my kids. If I ever see them, I'll treat it seriously and get them help as soon as possible. 3. That said, I also try to keep things in perspective myself. There are so many big risks. The best I can do is care for my little ones as best I can.

crescentfresh 8y ago
It's hard to prepare someone for emotional devastation from a life event. I had loving and supporting parents, and when I found out my exwife was cheating I went through some kind of scary. My kids no doubt will experience emotional torture at some point, I just hope it comes at a time that a) I'm there to realize it and be preemptive, or 2) they are adults that have some level of emotional balance (that I hopefully had a part in building :) to sustain and live through it. My greatest fear is that I will emotionally injure my kids despite my unconditional love for them. I make mistakes afterall, sometimes not even realizing it.
- oihoaihsfoiahsf 8y ago
  > My greatest fear is that I will emotionally injure my kids despite my unconditional love for them. You will. We all scar our children in different ways. The best we can do is make those scars as shallow as possible.
hvidgaard 8y ago
Regarding 1, it's one of the things I focus on a lot. I try not to "teach" resilience I think. I let them fail, and I'm emotional support when they fail. I let them see me fail, and I hope the combination will slowly instill resilience in them.

crescentfresh 8y ago

It's hard to prepare someone for emotional devastation from a life event. I had loving and supporting parents, and when I found out my exwife was cheating I went through some kind of scary. My kids no doubt will experience emotional torture at some point, I just hope it comes at a time that a) I'm there to realize it and be preemptive, or 2) they are adults that have some level of emotional balance (that I hopefully had a part in building :) to sustain and live through it. My greatest fear is that I will emotionally injure my kids despite my unconditional love for them. I make mistakes afterall, sometimes not even realizing it.

oihoaihsfoiahsf 8y ago
> My greatest fear is that I will emotionally injure my kids despite my unconditional love for them. You will. We all scar our children in different ways. The best we can do is make those scars as shallow as possible.

hvidgaard 8y ago

Regarding 1, it's one of the things I focus on a lot. I try not to "teach" resilience I think. I let them fail, and I'm emotional support when they fail. I let them see me fail, and I hope the combination will slowly instill resilience in them.