I think it's less about blame and more about objective recognition that the relationship and/or person was not as perfect as we'd like to think when we're going

I think it's less about blame and more about objective recognition that the relationship and/or person was not as perfect as we'd like to think when we're going through heartbreak. There's a quote from Bojack Horseman, "When you look at someone through rose colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags." I think this suggestion is more about being honest about the negatives that one looked past, even if one was content with the tradeoff.