I would suggest a hybrid: run your own incoming mail server, but use a trusted sender for outgoing mail. Fastmail is pretty good, but there are hundreds. This

I would suggest a hybrid: run your own incoming mail server, but use a trusted sender for outgoing mail. Fastmail is pretty good, but there are hundreds. This doesn't solve any prying eyes business, but it does give you some agency over your e-mail. Meanwhile, your never have to worry about mail being marked spam. It just works.