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“I Have a Secret. My Father Is Steve Jobs”

116 points by ForFreedom 8y ago

cntlzw 8y ago
I really enjoyed reading the article. Made me a bit sad though.
- m_alexgr 8y ago
  Yes to both.
dayofthedaleks 8y ago
“You’re not getting anything,” he said. “You understand? Nothing. You’re getting nothing.” Empty man consumed by his own emptiness, leaves shiny baubles behind.
- imesh 8y ago
  I'm not saying he wasn't an awful father, but he actually did leave her a multi-million dollar inheritance according to Wikipedia
  - rhapsodic 8y ago
    >I'm not saying he wasn't an awful father, but he actually did leave her a multi-million dollar inheritance according to Wikipedia He was not only an awful father, he was an awful person.
    - 3pt14159 8y ago
      It's not so black and white. He was erratic. Some things Jobs did were wonderful. In this situation I could see him detesting the way his relationships were poisoned with money and not wanting his daughter to rest on her laurels waiting for a payday.
      - rhapsodic 8y ago
        > In this situation I could see him detesting the way his relationships were poisoned with money and not wanting his daughter to rest on her laurels waiting for a payday. That's your takeaway from this? > “You’re not getting anything,” he said. “You understand? > Nothing. You’re getting nothing.” Did he mean about the > car, something else, bigger? I didn’t know. His voice > hurt—sharp, in my chest.
      - WalterSear 8y ago
        A search for 'nice things Steve Jobs did' is damning: watch how hard journalists struggle to find some small anecdotes of kindness to say about him. 'He came out and helped us fix my car in the driveway.' 'He gave his team inspiring speeches.' 'He protected the resources he needed from interdepartmental criticism.' It's clear that he was a dickhead to anyone he could get away with it to, while expressing the infrequent, but still present, in group-support, and the hyperbolic in-group praise, typical of a narcissist. He even died due to his own hubris.
      - paleotrope 8y ago
        Maybe he could have elaborated on that to his own daughter. Instead of requiring her to infer that this was the meaning.
adamc 8y ago
It sort of confirmed other things I've read; Jobs was really a dick at times.
- girvo 8y ago
  From what I’ve read, and even the biography, he was a dick pretty much all the time. But the brilliance that was (rightly or wrongly, I pass no judgement other than I lean towards the former) assigned to him meant people ignored it for the most part. Fascinating really.
- ubermonkey 8y ago
  My suspicion is that it's nearly impossible to find anybody with the kind of business success Jobs had that ISN'T a dick at least a good chunk of the time. Gates was famously so, at least when he was leading MSFT. Ballmer, moreso. Ellison is a well known asshole. Etc. It's especially true of founders, I reckon, because through grit and luck they find themselves atop a large heap of money and power, and it's very easy to forget how much of their success was due to luck -- and very easy to believe that it was all due to how exceptional and smart and visionary they were, or whatever. So, yeah, probably a dick. Probably not somebody with a lot of close friends. I mean, would YOU be friends with a guy who was denying his own child like that?
  - resiros 8y ago
    Being a dick in a professional setting is quite different from being it in a personal setting. I think it is okay to be ruthless in business, on the other hand, with your own daughter, that is something different.
    - threatofrain 8y ago
      I scarcely imagine that a temperate man shows up to work and dials up the asshole to be successful, then dials it back down when he gets home. Moreso, I would imagine your personality follows you where you go, and sometimes by coincidence your personality is good for business.
MaupitiBlue 8y ago
As a father of a little girl, I cannot fathom denying my daughter. Jobs sucked.
- magic_beans 8y ago
  He told her to her face she wasn’t his daughter. He was an awful person to her.
magic_beans 8y ago
Jobs was stunningly cruel to his daughter.
grzm 8y ago
dupe: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=17666649 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=17666649
- ardy42 8y ago
  That post seems like it kinda died on the vine. This one seems like it's getting a lot more traction.
spicyusername 8y ago
What a butt..
tinktank 8y ago
All the money in the world couldn't save him... (that and quack remedies)
alberthartman 8y ago
He was a person still in the process of evolving himself. He still had many flaws that he was unable to correct before he died. But from what I could tell he was making progress on those aspects right up until his death. Unfortunate. Still, he led a pretty good life everything considered.

116 points by ForFreedom 8y ago

cntlzw 8y ago

I really enjoyed reading the article. Made me a bit sad though.

m_alexgr 8y ago
Yes to both.

dayofthedaleks 8y ago

“You’re not getting anything,” he said. “You understand? Nothing. You’re getting nothing.” Empty man consumed by his own emptiness, leaves shiny baubles behind.

imesh 8y ago
I'm not saying he wasn't an awful father, but he actually did leave her a multi-million dollar inheritance according to Wikipedia
- rhapsodic 8y ago
  >I'm not saying he wasn't an awful father, but he actually did leave her a multi-million dollar inheritance according to Wikipedia He was not only an awful father, he was an awful person.
  - 3pt14159 8y ago
    It's not so black and white. He was erratic. Some things Jobs did were wonderful. In this situation I could see him detesting the way his relationships were poisoned with money and not wanting his daughter to rest on her laurels waiting for a payday.
    - rhapsodic 8y ago
      > In this situation I could see him detesting the way his relationships were poisoned with money and not wanting his daughter to rest on her laurels waiting for a payday. That's your takeaway from this? > “You’re not getting anything,” he said. “You understand? > Nothing. You’re getting nothing.” Did he mean about the > car, something else, bigger? I didn’t know. His voice > hurt—sharp, in my chest.
    - WalterSear 8y ago
      A search for 'nice things Steve Jobs did' is damning: watch how hard journalists struggle to find some small anecdotes of kindness to say about him. 'He came out and helped us fix my car in the driveway.' 'He gave his team inspiring speeches.' 'He protected the resources he needed from interdepartmental criticism.' It's clear that he was a dickhead to anyone he could get away with it to, while expressing the infrequent, but still present, in group-support, and the hyperbolic in-group praise, typical of a narcissist. He even died due to his own hubris.
    - paleotrope 8y ago
      Maybe he could have elaborated on that to his own daughter. Instead of requiring her to infer that this was the meaning.

adamc 8y ago

It sort of confirmed other things I've read; Jobs was really a dick at times.

girvo 8y ago
From what I’ve read, and even the biography, he was a dick pretty much all the time. But the brilliance that was (rightly or wrongly, I pass no judgement other than I lean towards the former) assigned to him meant people ignored it for the most part. Fascinating really.
ubermonkey 8y ago
My suspicion is that it's nearly impossible to find anybody with the kind of business success Jobs had that ISN'T a dick at least a good chunk of the time. Gates was famously so, at least when he was leading MSFT. Ballmer, moreso. Ellison is a well known asshole. Etc. It's especially true of founders, I reckon, because through grit and luck they find themselves atop a large heap of money and power, and it's very easy to forget how much of their success was due to luck -- and very easy to believe that it was all due to how exceptional and smart and visionary they were, or whatever. So, yeah, probably a dick. Probably not somebody with a lot of close friends. I mean, would YOU be friends with a guy who was denying his own child like that?
- resiros 8y ago
  Being a dick in a professional setting is quite different from being it in a personal setting. I think it is okay to be ruthless in business, on the other hand, with your own daughter, that is something different.
  - threatofrain 8y ago
    I scarcely imagine that a temperate man shows up to work and dials up the asshole to be successful, then dials it back down when he gets home. Moreso, I would imagine your personality follows you where you go, and sometimes by coincidence your personality is good for business.

MaupitiBlue 8y ago

As a father of a little girl, I cannot fathom denying my daughter. Jobs sucked.

magic_beans 8y ago
He told her to her face she wasn’t his daughter. He was an awful person to her.

magic_beans 8y ago

Jobs was stunningly cruel to his daughter.

grzm 8y ago

dupe: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=17666649 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=17666649

ardy42 8y ago
That post seems like it kinda died on the vine. This one seems like it's getting a lot more traction.

spicyusername 8y ago

What a butt..

tinktank 8y ago

All the money in the world couldn't save him... (that and quack remedies)

alberthartman 8y ago

He was a person still in the process of evolving himself. He still had many flaws that he was unable to correct before he died. But from what I could tell he was making progress on those aspects right up until his death. Unfortunate. Still, he led a pretty good life everything considered.