3 ms·
Most of the comments seem to divide into two categories: those who have experienced this failure mode, and those attacking the author. As someone who has learn
by shawn 8y ago
Most of the comments seem to divide into two categories: those who have experienced this failure mode, and those attacking the author.
As someone who has learned not to do this, here is what the author is saying. You subconsciously care about yourself more than the person you're talking to. When you want something from them, that's a bad idea.
Those two sentences, if internalized, will cure you of trying to be clever. There's no room for clever when you have to be effective. At least, not manufactured clever.
- sbjs 8y agoYou can still care about yourself more than the person but at the same time want something from them badly enough that you'll reverse this when you interact with them. It's called sucking up.
- sbjs 8y agoTo clarify, I don't recommend it. Just giving food for thought.
- PhasmaFelis 8y agoYou think attempting to be polite when you're asking for a favor is "sucking up"?
- franciscop 8y agoBut the implicit act of comunication is because you want something regarding the person you are talking with, right? Even if it's offering something, you _still_ want them to accept it. I learned a lot about this through StackOverflow questions. Yes, you want your answer. But you have to be willing to first try very hard by yourself, and to make sure you make it easy for people to answer it to understand you quick and easy.