I think you've put it a nice way, but one of the things I've realised as I've gotten older is: People treat <insert something here> people really differently an

I think you've put it a nice way, but one of the things I've realised as I've gotten older is: People treat <insert something here> people really differently and don't even realise it. If you've got a big nose, or your eyes are too close together, or you don't have symmetry in your face. Or you are too tall. Or you have a lot of body hair. Or you don't have enough body hair. Or your skin has a strange (for the area) complexion (or just not normal for most people, even). There are beautiful (in the eyes of society) people in the world and they have certain advantages. There are smart (to the eyes of society) people in the world and they have certain advantages. There are physically gifted (compared to the average in the society) people in the world and they have certain advantages. Christiano Ronaldo makes over $100 million dollars a year, of which nearly $50 million comes from endorsements (nice to have a pretty face as well as being a talented footballer!) Life isn't fair in these ways. Is there anything wrong with wanting to have hair on your head, or getting plastic surgery, or body building to look the way you want? Absolutely nothing (especially the last one can be pretty darn positive for anyone). However, I think it's important not to chase these things excessively. There is a huge danger of thinking, "My life would turn around if only I wasn't saddled with this handicap". You can seriously sabotage yourself by not realising that most people have lots of hurdles and still find ways of surmounting them. As a visible minority in the place where I choose to live, I see this kind of self-sabotage often, where people choose to believe that racism makes it impossible for them to succeed, rather than to acknowledge that it is a factor that they need to deal with. Some people (especially the elderly) are genuinely afraid when they see me coming. However, this fear usually turns to relief and joy when I smile and greet them kindly. Instead of being shunned because people fear me, I have an advantage over other people because that mini-drama that people must overcome when they first meet me, brings them closer. It's a bit like seeing a lion walking down the street and then when you find out it is an extremely friendly, goofy, tame lion, of course you want to pet it! The oft-repeated advice of "just be yourself" is good, I think. It doesn't mean it won't be a challenge, but overcoming that challenge brings you benefits beyond "fixing" whatever problem that you feel you have.