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The article started with about author's experience hanging out with some really positive people, and somehow made a conclusion about needing to hang out more wi

The article started with about author's experience hanging out with some really positive people, and somehow made a conclusion about needing to hang out more with happy people (happy != positive). Then goes on to describe various benefits of having close friendships or social circles that you can depend on, and basically used dependable friend and happy friend interchangeably. Although, despite being such a poorly written article, I do agree that having a group of close friends who you can depend on for good and bad times is huge for our mental health and happiness.

jbattle 8y ago
Yeah - maybe it's just the lingo of "positive" people, or maybe I haven't met enough "negative" people (lucky!?), but the (happy != positive) angle should have been explored a little bit. The best friends in my life are not the same friends that have always been easy / happy / positive. But it is the people that I've known through tough times that I rely on now. It's all too easy to step away from people when one or the other is in a tough spot and this article runs the risk of encouraging that behavior. By my reading anyhow
- ljm 8y ago
  It's way too easy these days to identify some undesirable behaviour in a relationship and instantly jump to the conclusion that they must be abusive or toxic, despite the fact that many people have their ups and downs. Throwing an abandonment issue or two their way by ditching them at the first tough moment is hardly going to uplift them, and if you care enough about them maybe what's needed is some stronger boundaries while that stuff is going on. You'll never nourish such a deep, loving friendship if you're expecting your friends to be basically perfect: happy, easy-going, not giving you any trouble. Going through some tough shit together can really strengthen that bond and open you up to a kind of positivity and happiness you'll never get from those who simply wear it as a mask.

jbattle 8y ago

Yeah - maybe it's just the lingo of "positive" people, or maybe I haven't met enough "negative" people (lucky!?), but the (happy != positive) angle should have been explored a little bit. The best friends in my life are not the same friends that have always been easy / happy / positive. But it is the people that I've known through tough times that I rely on now. It's all too easy to step away from people when one or the other is in a tough spot and this article runs the risk of encouraging that behavior. By my reading anyhow

ljm 8y ago
It's way too easy these days to identify some undesirable behaviour in a relationship and instantly jump to the conclusion that they must be abusive or toxic, despite the fact that many people have their ups and downs. Throwing an abandonment issue or two their way by ditching them at the first tough moment is hardly going to uplift them, and if you care enough about them maybe what's needed is some stronger boundaries while that stuff is going on. You'll never nourish such a deep, loving friendship if you're expecting your friends to be basically perfect: happy, easy-going, not giving you any trouble. Going through some tough shit together can really strengthen that bond and open you up to a kind of positivity and happiness you'll never get from those who simply wear it as a mask.