Your examples contrast the two extremes of housing density: detached home surrounded by lots of land vs high density apartments. There is a huge swath of possi

Your examples contrast the two extremes of housing density: detached home surrounded by lots of land vs high density apartments. There is a huge swath of possibilities in between, including dense, detached housing, smaller condo developments, and villages that provide many of the benefits you attribute only to detached low density housing, including self maintenance, private parking, etc. With higher density, these places also provide easy access to greenspace for children, with the qualification that it is usually public greenspace. You are not as likely to find this setup in big city centers like Manhattan or Chicago, nor in the vast low density suburban sprawl, but rather in older pre-car towns that have retained their human scale development pattern.