It's going to be very easy to point out that these lessons were learned in an abusive environment (which it certainly sounds like they were), while completely g

It's going to be very easy to point out that these lessons were learned in an abusive environment (which it certainly sounds like they were), while completely glossing over the importance of the actual lessons. How an idea is expressed and the value of the idea are orthogonal. If someone is yelling at you, maybe they are just being an asshole. And maybe they are telling you something valuable, albeit in an unfortunate fashion.