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Not directly mindfulness related, but I've been doing EMDR to try to break some self destructive reactions / anxiety. The first major part of processing that g
by zentiggr 8y ago
Not directly mindfulness related, but I've been doing EMDR to try to break some self destructive reactions / anxiety. The first major part of processing that got to the core of my panic reactions left me with a 'gaping hole in my brain' where my panic reactions were... I'm still working on what's refilling that void, but I'm not as weirded out as I was those first couple of days.
Felt like when something triggery came up, I knew how I was going to respond and then I didn't... and haven't always been sure what else was appropriate. Relearning who I want to be is interesting / challenging / confusing.
- notduncansmith 8y ago> Relearning who I want to be is interesting / challenging / confusing. One thing that adds to the challenge is figuring out how to socialize as your newest self, balancing the new internal constraints with the external ones (some of which you may not have been aware of). What have you learned in that regard?
- zentiggr 8y agoI've definitely gotten more assertively talkative, not as concerned if I say something out of tune or that falls flat. I've found a reservoir of resentment/anger that is my next focus... and I've been on the verge of random crying breakdowns here and there. I've been advised that "fake it until you make it" doesn't just apply to startups, and there are lots of times that I put on the "same me" mask while my head spins inside. I can see myself making some waves amongst family and friends at some point as I change, but I can't see any big issues, just adjustments.