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Yes, your concern is valid and this is a real concept. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Victim_playing https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Victim_playing It comes down

by delbel 8y ago

Yes, your concern is valid and this is a real concept. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Victim_playing https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Victim_playing It comes down to, and I quote wikipedia "To break the hold of the negative complex, and to escape the passivity of victimhood, requires taking responsibility for one's own desires and long-term actions.[15]"

kolbe 8y ago
This is a little circular, though. When the culture of the time makes it evident that you should be on the defensive with respect to sexual harassment/assault due to its prevalence, then you're more likely to have a false-positive read to any situation.
- delbel 8y ago
  > This is a little circular, though. When the culture of the time makes it evident that you should be on the defensive with respect to sexual harassment/assault due to its prevalence, then you're more likely to have a false-positive read to any situation. Well unfortunately I am not subscribed to this "culture of the time" or any herd mentalities, or what I call collective delusions, nor does this invalidate the concept of victimization. So the issue you have is not my concern. I value independent thought and free thinking and call out group think and wrong think.
  - kolbe 8y ago
    Unfortunately for you, language and communication is a game theoretic concept. So as much as you want to be objectively right about any communication that takes place, that's not a concept that exists. What you see as 'independent and free' for the most part is just isolated and narcissistic thoughts that are consistent with your own brain. And especially for things like sexual harassment, this is a very careless stance to take. The fact that you don't think you're harassing someone means almost nothing. You have to be educated and aware enough to understand how they might interpret a situation, even if they're idiots.
    - delbel 8y ago
      Being objective is a real thing. The poster pointed out, that women on stack overflow were complaining about being sexually harassed. Then the poster pointed out, there was no way to know if the person was a woman or not at the time. So objectively, it was impossible for somebody to sexually harass them if the variable of their sex was not known. The poster wanted to know how something like this can happen. I posted, in reply, that there this is a real concept in psychology, that this situation is known about, and linked to a wikipedia article that briefly covered the subject. What you did was take what I said, and applied to generally to the original posting -- and took my words out of context. You then projected your own narcissistic thoughts onto me as a way to shame me for something out of context. I don't appreciate this and I will call out this type of thinking everytime I see it. You seem to have a high intelligence so I am hoping you see this as a blessing and reflect on what I am saying. Being objective is a learned discipline that not everyone has. Not everyone can do it, and, objectively, nobody is 100% objective. But that doesn't mean we can strive in our communication to try being so the best we can. Don't take my words out of context and try to shame me, it won't work.

by delbel 8y ago

kolbe 8y ago

This is a little circular, though. When the culture of the time makes it evident that you should be on the defensive with respect to sexual harassment/assault due to its prevalence, then you're more likely to have a false-positive read to any situation.

delbel 8y ago
> This is a little circular, though. When the culture of the time makes it evident that you should be on the defensive with respect to sexual harassment/assault due to its prevalence, then you're more likely to have a false-positive read to any situation. Well unfortunately I am not subscribed to this "culture of the time" or any herd mentalities, or what I call collective delusions, nor does this invalidate the concept of victimization. So the issue you have is not my concern. I value independent thought and free thinking and call out group think and wrong think.
- kolbe 8y ago
  Unfortunately for you, language and communication is a game theoretic concept. So as much as you want to be objectively right about any communication that takes place, that's not a concept that exists. What you see as 'independent and free' for the most part is just isolated and narcissistic thoughts that are consistent with your own brain. And especially for things like sexual harassment, this is a very careless stance to take. The fact that you don't think you're harassing someone means almost nothing. You have to be educated and aware enough to understand how they might interpret a situation, even if they're idiots.
  - delbel 8y ago
    Being objective is a real thing. The poster pointed out, that women on stack overflow were complaining about being sexually harassed. Then the poster pointed out, there was no way to know if the person was a woman or not at the time. So objectively, it was impossible for somebody to sexually harass them if the variable of their sex was not known. The poster wanted to know how something like this can happen. I posted, in reply, that there this is a real concept in psychology, that this situation is known about, and linked to a wikipedia article that briefly covered the subject. What you did was take what I said, and applied to generally to the original posting -- and took my words out of context. You then projected your own narcissistic thoughts onto me as a way to shame me for something out of context. I don't appreciate this and I will call out this type of thinking everytime I see it. You seem to have a high intelligence so I am hoping you see this as a blessing and reflect on what I am saying. Being objective is a learned discipline that not everyone has. Not everyone can do it, and, objectively, nobody is 100% objective. But that doesn't mean we can strive in our communication to try being so the best we can. Don't take my words out of context and try to shame me, it won't work.