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This is a bravery debate, in other words. http://slatestarcodex.com/2013/06/09/all-debates-are-bravery-debates/ http://slatestarcodex.com/2013/06/09/all-debate

by Felz 8y ago

This is a bravery debate, in other words. http://slatestarcodex.com/2013/06/09/all-debates-are-bravery-debates/ http://slatestarcodex.com/2013/06/09/all-debates-are-bravery... There are probably people who really need to hear "your problems are real and you should get help" and also those who need to hear "your problems are mainly self inflicted and you need to deal". This article gives the same advice for both types, and that's pretty dangerous.

RickS 8y ago
That was a hugely useful read, thank you! It fits perfectly. A former coworker of mine recently recommended The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck. She said she read it in my voice. I couldn't stand it, and I couldn't figure out the source of the dissonance. She needed the thing I do. I need the thing she does (give more fucks). We can't read and grow from the same books. Really useful mental model here. I'd be interested in anything else you'd suggest as a good read.
- Felz 8y ago
  I wish I could be more help for good reads. Unfortunately, I tend not to write them down, and the best stuff only sinks in later. SSC is usually fairly interesting for stuff like though, which is why I can remember to link it. For example, later post on the same topic: http://slatestarcodex.com/2014/03/24/should-you-reverse-any-advice-you-hear/ http://slatestarcodex.com/2014/03/24/should-you-reverse-any-...
elipsey 8y ago
Yes, I know this article too, and I apologize for the collateral annoying-ness of my comment. I knew I was stepping in one of those, but it’s not what I came in here for. The downside of being ill-advised in this way is exceptionally, asymmetrically, high for certain people (and maybe anyone standing next to them). That’s who I was talking to. If you had seen what I've seen you might regretfully do the same. Best regards, sorry for the inconvenience.
- Felz 8y ago
  Absolutely. I actually agree with you- this is playing with fire- I just thought it'd be helpful to point out the general dilemma. This is sort of awkward on HN, because there's a culture of stoic self-reliance that's very helpful for, well, startups. "Create your own destiny" and "you don't have to bear the burden alone" don't mix well.

by Felz 8y ago

RickS 8y ago

That was a hugely useful read, thank you! It fits perfectly. A former coworker of mine recently recommended The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck. She said she read it in my voice. I couldn't stand it, and I couldn't figure out the source of the dissonance. She needed the thing I do. I need the thing she does (give more fucks). We can't read and grow from the same books. Really useful mental model here. I'd be interested in anything else you'd suggest as a good read.

Felz 8y ago
I wish I could be more help for good reads. Unfortunately, I tend not to write them down, and the best stuff only sinks in later. SSC is usually fairly interesting for stuff like though, which is why I can remember to link it. For example, later post on the same topic: http://slatestarcodex.com/2014/03/24/should-you-reverse-any-advice-you-hear/ http://slatestarcodex.com/2014/03/24/should-you-reverse-any-...

elipsey 8y ago

Yes, I know this article too, and I apologize for the collateral annoying-ness of my comment. I knew I was stepping in one of those, but it’s not what I came in here for. The downside of being ill-advised in this way is exceptionally, asymmetrically, high for certain people (and maybe anyone standing next to them). That’s who I was talking to. If you had seen what I've seen you might regretfully do the same. Best regards, sorry for the inconvenience.

Felz 8y ago
Absolutely. I actually agree with you- this is playing with fire- I just thought it'd be helpful to point out the general dilemma. This is sort of awkward on HN, because there's a culture of stoic self-reliance that's very helpful for, well, startups. "Create your own destiny" and "you don't have to bear the burden alone" don't mix well.