The way I understood it is: "By failing my business other people will think because I am a foreigner and I failed my business most other foreigners are failures

The way I understood it is: "By failing my business other people will think because I am a foreigner and I failed my business most other foreigners are failures as well and I don't want that" My point is that he shouldn't let hypotheticals like that keep him from doing what is best for him, especially if suicide is in the cards.