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Your second point has made me realize that not having identity outside of work is the biggest source of my anxiety. Thanks! I also can’t seem to stop thinking

Your second point has made me realize that not having identity outside of work is the biggest source of my anxiety. Thanks! I also can’t seem to stop thinking about work. Maybe it’s related to that point. I can’t enjoy anything since there is always “but you should be solving problem X” in the back of my mind. Maybe it’s the type of personality I have - if there is a problem, I can’t stop ruminating about it. It’s mostly work related since that’s why I do 95% of the time, but other problems too, especially when dealing with people. I know I am not adding any value to the discussion - just wanted to thank you for your insights and to the person that asked the question.

Latteland 8y ago
I get that feeling too that I can't enjoy anything until I get a problem done. Then I do that big thing, and for a few days I feel relief until another issue comes up that I have to do, but don't want to do or its hard and scary.
- aragorn2 8y ago
  I get what you’re saying. I wish it were like that for me. I can’t get anything done. Maybe it’s the type of work. Upper management is always uhappy, users are hostile (for a reason), enormous technological debt paralizing all development. I am simply incompetent to deal with people, juggle the requests and politics. It’s been like this for more then ten years. I am sick to my stomack when thinking about our software product. I’m taking anxiety medication, have stress related heart condition. I don’t know why am writing this. I’m venting I guess. Not a place for that. I will stop now.
  - aragorn2 8y ago
    And my spelling sucks!
    - Latteland 8y ago
      I think talking to a therapist is one way to deal with issues like this. Feeling overly anxious about your job doesn't help anything. Course it's easy to say that, harder to deal with it.
fjones12 8y ago
I've had this problem too. It really does help to find other interests outside work - running or yoga, bowling, poker, video games, art, family time, whatever it is. For me, it was hard to feel okay doing something else. For some reason, I felt like I should always be thinking about work. But that's just not true - having a multi-faceted identity makes everything better. It also has helped my mental toughness - if I have a bad day (or week, month, year) at work, I still have other things to fall back on, things that bring me joy and help define who I am as a person. Before, if something went wrong at work, it crushed me. Now I have more perspective, and work issues don't have as much weight as they used to. Only took me a few decades to figure it out! Hope yours works out more quickly.

Latteland 8y ago

I get that feeling too that I can't enjoy anything until I get a problem done. Then I do that big thing, and for a few days I feel relief until another issue comes up that I have to do, but don't want to do or its hard and scary.

aragorn2 8y ago
I get what you’re saying. I wish it were like that for me. I can’t get anything done. Maybe it’s the type of work. Upper management is always uhappy, users are hostile (for a reason), enormous technological debt paralizing all development. I am simply incompetent to deal with people, juggle the requests and politics. It’s been like this for more then ten years. I am sick to my stomack when thinking about our software product. I’m taking anxiety medication, have stress related heart condition. I don’t know why am writing this. I’m venting I guess. Not a place for that. I will stop now.
- aragorn2 8y ago
  And my spelling sucks!
  - Latteland 8y ago
    I think talking to a therapist is one way to deal with issues like this. Feeling overly anxious about your job doesn't help anything. Course it's easy to say that, harder to deal with it.

fjones12 8y ago

I've had this problem too. It really does help to find other interests outside work - running or yoga, bowling, poker, video games, art, family time, whatever it is. For me, it was hard to feel okay doing something else. For some reason, I felt like I should always be thinking about work. But that's just not true - having a multi-faceted identity makes everything better. It also has helped my mental toughness - if I have a bad day (or week, month, year) at work, I still have other things to fall back on, things that bring me joy and help define who I am as a person. Before, if something went wrong at work, it crushed me. Now I have more perspective, and work issues don't have as much weight as they used to. Only took me a few decades to figure it out! Hope yours works out more quickly.