5 ms·

People don't buy prestige items for value, they buy them to show off the fact they can drop x amount on items with no utilitarian value

eximius 8y ago
Only if they're disillusioned. Many people have drunk the koolaid.
josefresco 8y ago
What's funny about this attitude is how little the value of your engagement ring matters once the wedding is over, and the dust settles. Maybe in certain social circles, the size/quality of an engagement ring continues to be important, but from my anecdotal experience, no one notices or cares about my wife's engagement ring, unless they are getting married soon.
- closeparen 8y ago
  The traditional purpose is to make a demonstration of your means and seriousness; that purpose is fulfilled the moment your proposal is accepted. It really only matters for a few seconds.
  - josefresco 8y ago
    That's a good perspective. I'm not sure how relevant "demonstration of your means" is to modern society but "seriousness" certainly implies that it cost a significant amount. Most counter-arguments I hear object to the cost, without acknowledging that the cost is not created by the artificial scarcity of a diamonds, but rather the proposer's implied seriousness.
  - kolpa 8y ago
    Sure. But I'd prefer a $10K donation to the charity of my choice, or to my student loans, or a vacation, or a car.
- mywittyname 8y ago
  Mine doesn't even wear her engagement ring anymore. Ironically, it's "too expensive" to wear day-to-day and risk losing, so it never gets worn.
hospes 8y ago
I recalled this joke after reading your comment, one guy working in finances asks another guy working in finances: - How much did you pay for your tie? - $400 in the store next door. - They tricked you! Store across the street sells the same tie for $800. If you are paying 10K for an engagement ring and I can buy the same exact engagement ring for 1K, it is just matter of time when your ring will loose it's "social show off value", because "everyone" will have similar rings. I think after some time De Beers or a company similar to theirs will find for rich and/or overly emotional people something else very expensive to buy to show their "love". It is just a social signal "my ring is better than yours" => "my male ape is better than your male ape" => "I am more superior". People are social animals, social signals are very important for them, they'll always find a way to send social signals: super expensive cars, shiny things, handbags for $5K, golden iPhone for 18K, ... Look at luxury industry, it is booming.
- Kadin 8y ago
  Except that people rarely show off engagement rings once they're married. It's not about the ring, it's about the expense. The same purpose could be served by just piling up twenty-dollar bills and setting them on fire, and the person with the biggest pile of bills to set on fire would be the highest status. There are cultures historically where stuff like that was common: generally as sacrificial offerings, but same thing really -- if you can afford to sacrifice a horse, in a culture where a horse is really valuable, it means you're really fucking serious about whatever you're doing, or so rich that you can do it casually, one of the two.
  - kolpa 8y ago
    Sacrificing a horse at least served the purpose of feeding the priests. > serious about whatever you're doing, or so rich that you can do it casually or, the common case: bluffing and setting up for a financial and relationship disaster down the road.

eximius 8y ago

Only if they're disillusioned. Many people have drunk the koolaid.

josefresco 8y ago

What's funny about this attitude is how little the value of your engagement ring matters once the wedding is over, and the dust settles. Maybe in certain social circles, the size/quality of an engagement ring continues to be important, but from my anecdotal experience, no one notices or cares about my wife's engagement ring, unless they are getting married soon.

closeparen 8y ago
The traditional purpose is to make a demonstration of your means and seriousness; that purpose is fulfilled the moment your proposal is accepted. It really only matters for a few seconds.
- josefresco 8y ago
  That's a good perspective. I'm not sure how relevant "demonstration of your means" is to modern society but "seriousness" certainly implies that it cost a significant amount. Most counter-arguments I hear object to the cost, without acknowledging that the cost is not created by the artificial scarcity of a diamonds, but rather the proposer's implied seriousness.
- kolpa 8y ago
  Sure. But I'd prefer a $10K donation to the charity of my choice, or to my student loans, or a vacation, or a car.
mywittyname 8y ago
Mine doesn't even wear her engagement ring anymore. Ironically, it's "too expensive" to wear day-to-day and risk losing, so it never gets worn.

hospes 8y ago

I recalled this joke after reading your comment, one guy working in finances asks another guy working in finances: - How much did you pay for your tie? - $400 in the store next door. - They tricked you! Store across the street sells the same tie for $800. If you are paying 10K for an engagement ring and I can buy the same exact engagement ring for 1K, it is just matter of time when your ring will loose it's "social show off value", because "everyone" will have similar rings. I think after some time De Beers or a company similar to theirs will find for rich and/or overly emotional people something else very expensive to buy to show their "love". It is just a social signal "my ring is better than yours" => "my male ape is better than your male ape" => "I am more superior". People are social animals, social signals are very important for them, they'll always find a way to send social signals: super expensive cars, shiny things, handbags for $5K, golden iPhone for 18K, ... Look at luxury industry, it is booming.

Kadin 8y ago
Except that people rarely show off engagement rings once they're married. It's not about the ring, it's about the expense. The same purpose could be served by just piling up twenty-dollar bills and setting them on fire, and the person with the biggest pile of bills to set on fire would be the highest status. There are cultures historically where stuff like that was common: generally as sacrificial offerings, but same thing really -- if you can afford to sacrifice a horse, in a culture where a horse is really valuable, it means you're really fucking serious about whatever you're doing, or so rich that you can do it casually, one of the two.
- kolpa 8y ago
  Sacrificing a horse at least served the purpose of feeding the priests. > serious about whatever you're doing, or so rich that you can do it casually or, the common case: bluffing and setting up for a financial and relationship disaster down the road.