Does stopping saying awful, cruel, mean, self-defeating things to oneself help? To ask that is to answer it. Sure, I don't mean never to self-criticize. That's

Does stopping saying awful, cruel, mean, self-defeating things to oneself help? To ask that is to answer it. Sure, I don't mean never to self-criticize. That's how u get better. In Effortless Mastery, he says--when you rehearse/practise, then's the time for ruthless self-criticism etc.--but on the gig, never. I used to, while playing gigs, often be thinking "Oh yuk! Oh that sux. Oh no. Oh god Im so awful" constantly etc ..beating myself up, so it sounded awful. Since then I totally stopped doing that; I just enjoy myself and let the music flow. It's hard to believe I used to be so self-destructive. It's so easy to be so mean to ourselves in a way we never would be with other people. Maybe you didn't grow up with that problem. It's part of what 'loving yourself' means, which I definitely had to learn, in my twenties.