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> There’s also been a shift due to online and apps that give women an unlimited choice of men while giving the majority of men nearly no choice How can that be

> There’s also been a shift due to online and apps that give women an unlimited choice of men while giving the majority of men nearly no choice How can that be? Why would it be empowering for one gender but not the other? What would the underlying reason be to explain that kind of social phenomenon? > I see my male friends really struggle and I see my female friends have unlimited options. I can counter your anecdata with my own...many of the women I know are having great difficulty finding men online because, in their experience, they're very picky. Speaking as a man, I would say I've also become more picky over time, not less. Here we're trading localized experience, but I think that there should be an accountable cause that would explain only men being adversely impacted. I don't see an obvious reason why online dating would make things harder for men but not harder for women and vice versa. I think the broader trend in online dating is that it's harder for unattractive people to find partners, regardless of sexual identity or preference; conversely it seems to be getting progressively easier for attractive people to find partners. People are presented with significantly more options, which makes me hypothesize that they're willing to say no to many people they would otherwise settle for. I don't think that's particularly harder on men than it is on women.

brighteyes 8y ago
>> There’s also been a shift due to online and apps that give women an unlimited choice of men while giving the majority of men nearly no choice > How can that be? Why would it be empowering for one gender but not the other? What would the underlying reason be to explain that kind of social phenomenon? Because there are large social differences between how the genders date. Given such differences, a change in how dating is done may favor one gender more than another. In practice, the most noticeable difference is that men are expected to message women (barring rare exceptions like Bumble). In current online dating, that means women receive a great many messages and can pick between them, while men must send a great many to have a chance at a response. At least that initial stage of dating has shifted in women's favor in recent years, but as you said, that's not the whole picture and despite all the messages women may have a hard time finding someone they like, depending on what they are looking for.
andriesm 8y ago
>>I don't see an obvious reason why online dating would make things harder for men but not harder for women and vice versa. I think the broader trend in online dating is that it's harder for unattractive people to find partners, regardless of sexual identity... On dating sites, men rate 50 percent of women as below average (in line with the statistical expectation), while women rate 80 percent of men as below average. It is a fact that women are pickier than men on average, and that women are less willing to marry down and to settle for less, than men are. This is why there is gender assymetry in how increased information efficiency in the dating market affects SMV (sexual market value) of men and women.

brighteyes 8y ago

>> There’s also been a shift due to online and apps that give women an unlimited choice of men while giving the majority of men nearly no choice > How can that be? Why would it be empowering for one gender but not the other? What would the underlying reason be to explain that kind of social phenomenon? Because there are large social differences between how the genders date. Given such differences, a change in how dating is done may favor one gender more than another. In practice, the most noticeable difference is that men are expected to message women (barring rare exceptions like Bumble). In current online dating, that means women receive a great many messages and can pick between them, while men must send a great many to have a chance at a response. At least that initial stage of dating has shifted in women's favor in recent years, but as you said, that's not the whole picture and despite all the messages women may have a hard time finding someone they like, depending on what they are looking for.

andriesm 8y ago

>>I don't see an obvious reason why online dating would make things harder for men but not harder for women and vice versa. I think the broader trend in online dating is that it's harder for unattractive people to find partners, regardless of sexual identity... On dating sites, men rate 50 percent of women as below average (in line with the statistical expectation), while women rate 80 percent of men as below average. It is a fact that women are pickier than men on average, and that women are less willing to marry down and to settle for less, than men are. This is why there is gender assymetry in how increased information efficiency in the dating market affects SMV (sexual market value) of men and women.