I've had a book in my nightstand for at least 2 years and every once in a while I swear to myself "this month I'm gonna read it, this month..." then I fall asle

I've had a book in my nightstand for at least 2 years and every once in a while I swear to myself "this month I'm gonna read it, this month..." then I fall asleep. I better call my layer and get my story straight for when the thought police get here demanding answers.