4 ms·

You can “go with your gut” and include that in your information to potential employers and wonder why you can’t find work OR you can alter your approach given t

You can “go with your gut” and include that in your information to potential employers and wonder why you can’t find work OR you can alter your approach given the HN advice and increase your chances. Here are a couple of reasons to remove that “hobby” from you job pitch: - It makes you seem like you like to give “all your love” to multiple women - at the same time. Now this may be acceptable to some but, generally speaking, this comes off as duplicitous since it might be assumed that the women don’t know this since most women would not agree to such a relationship. While this may not be your intent, it is a reasonable interpretation. - If I was an employer, the fact that your wrote this would make you seem like someone who might “hit” on my female employees. The last thing I need to hire someone who might make my workplace “toxic”. If you have some good friends who are better at “this human stuff”, ask them to look over your resume/CV/cover letters and help you. This is great advice for anyone really. Good luck with your job search!

Jugurtha 8y ago
Where to begin.. First, I'm debating not because I lack perception of the possible ways OP's content may be interpreted, but because I am questioning the reasons of the ways it may be interpreted. There's a nuance that is not so hard to grasp. > most women would not agree to such a relationship. And you think that because you believe people treat all people the same? Meaning just because it is your experience that women would not agree to such a relationship means that they do not agree with such a relationship period? Did it occur to you that they may not be "agreeing" to such a relationship with you, i.e: that you are a variable that must be controlled in an experiment. Did it also occur to you that they may not be agreeing to such a relationship because you're the kind of person who thinks they may not? Did you think that such a thing may only be something you believe to be true, have you tried to prove yourself wrong and actually be in that kind of relationship? And if you did and failed to be in such relationships, is it enough to generalize and say that it's the women who do not agree to these relationships (and taking yourself out of the equation) or does it have something to do with you? Let me drive the point home: your whole argument is saying that you should separate your "private" persona from your "professional" persona. Which means you do not behave the same with your buddies as you do with your coworkers/employer.. Which means there are whole swaths of your personality that are unknown from your colleagues. Does the fact that some aspects of your personality are unknown to your colleagues mean that these aspect do not exist or do they just not exist in the same space and time as your colleagues? Does women willingness to be in such relationship not exist at all just because it does not exist within your time and space? Isn't this what someone who's good at "human stuff" should be aware of, or is it enough to have one's biases in check? Do you think the barely veiled condescension and snark in your penultimate sentence helps people expose their true self to you knowing they might be so negatively judged, do you not think it reinforces your beliefs about what "most" people would and would not agree to?
- chrisbennet 8y ago
  While arguing with people with people (who are attempting to help you) coupled with displays of intellectual stotting when you feel threatened, may seem like a good way to get a job offer, ask yourself: “How is that working out for me so far?”
  - Jugurtha 8y ago
    > While arguing with people with people (who are attempting to help you) coupled with displays of intellectual stotting when you feel threatened Precious. > may seem like a good way to get a job offer, ask yourself: “How is that working out for me so far?” I'm under the impression you think I'm OP (original poster). I'm not and I don't know why you'd assume I am or looking for a job.

Jugurtha 8y ago

Where to begin.. First, I'm debating not because I lack perception of the possible ways OP's content may be interpreted, but because I am questioning the reasons of the ways it may be interpreted. There's a nuance that is not so hard to grasp. > most women would not agree to such a relationship. And you think that because you believe people treat all people the same? Meaning just because it is your experience that women would not agree to such a relationship means that they do not agree with such a relationship period? Did it occur to you that they may not be "agreeing" to such a relationship with you, i.e: that you are a variable that must be controlled in an experiment. Did it also occur to you that they may not be agreeing to such a relationship because you're the kind of person who thinks they may not? Did you think that such a thing may only be something you believe to be true, have you tried to prove yourself wrong and actually be in that kind of relationship? And if you did and failed to be in such relationships, is it enough to generalize and say that it's the women who do not agree to these relationships (and taking yourself out of the equation) or does it have something to do with you? Let me drive the point home: your whole argument is saying that you should separate your "private" persona from your "professional" persona. Which means you do not behave the same with your buddies as you do with your coworkers/employer.. Which means there are whole swaths of your personality that are unknown from your colleagues. Does the fact that some aspects of your personality are unknown to your colleagues mean that these aspect do not exist or do they just not exist in the same space and time as your colleagues? Does women willingness to be in such relationship not exist at all just because it does not exist within your time and space? Isn't this what someone who's good at "human stuff" should be aware of, or is it enough to have one's biases in check? Do you think the barely veiled condescension and snark in your penultimate sentence helps people expose their true self to you knowing they might be so negatively judged, do you not think it reinforces your beliefs about what "most" people would and would not agree to?

chrisbennet 8y ago
While arguing with people with people (who are attempting to help you) coupled with displays of intellectual stotting when you feel threatened, may seem like a good way to get a job offer, ask yourself: “How is that working out for me so far?”
- Jugurtha 8y ago
  > While arguing with people with people (who are attempting to help you) coupled with displays of intellectual stotting when you feel threatened Precious. > may seem like a good way to get a job offer, ask yourself: “How is that working out for me so far?” I'm under the impression you think I'm OP (original poster). I'm not and I don't know why you'd assume I am or looking for a job.