8 ms·
From casual observation it appears that spouses who aren't introduced by mutual friends rarely like their spouse's friends. Friendships take time, are valued be
by louprado 8y ago
From casual observation it appears that spouses who aren't introduced by mutual friends rarely like their spouse's friends. Friendships take time, are valued because of shared past experiences, and require a certain personality alignment to be sustained.
Also when spouses go and spend time with the other spouse's friends, its challenging to simultaneously catch-up with their old friends while also trying to include their new spouse in the conversation.
Some married couples work through this but others just privately and repeatedly criticize each other's friends so eventually they are left with only one friend -- their spouse.
- amyjess 8y agoIt's for exactly this reason that I find being friends with married couples to be draining unless I knew them both before they got together. You can't just be friends with one of them. You can't just go and hang out with one person without their spouse coming along. If you tell them their spouse isn't invited, they'll get offended. If you don't tell them, you can expect the spouse to tag along... and if their spouse gets tired and wants to leave early, they're both just going to cut out right then and there (I had one friend who would just up and leave the bar with his wife whenever she got tired without even giving me a chance to finish my drink and tab out so we could leave together... every time, it felt like a slap in the face). Sometimes, even if I like their spouse, I just want to hang out with a friend one-on-one. And then there are people who I like but whose spouses I can't stand.