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Not advice, but for my 40th I visited nearly every important friend I've had. Several I'd basically lost touch with. I asked them deep questions about their liv
by aklemm 9y ago
Not advice, but for my 40th I visited nearly every important friend I've had. Several I'd basically lost touch with. I asked them deep questions about their lives and hopes and perspectives. It was quite a journey, and was heartening to connect to times long past (though I wasn't left missing any of it). The biggest thing I gleaned was the dissipation of angst among those with families.
As for advice; stay mobile.
- coffeemug 9y ago> the dissipation of angst Could you explain what you mean? This seems important, but I don't understand the phrase at all.
- aklemm 9y agoThe people with families seemed settled with their lot (which isn't to say they were without regrets), while the ones without families were sort of still searching for something. To me it just underscored the importance of focusing on the family if you have one.
- coffeemug 9y agoThanks. I'm 35, and have encountered the exact same thing among the various social circles I'm in.
- sorval 9y agoTheres a desolation that settles into your soul around your late 40s or early 50s. Not everyone, but its fairly common. You have to figure a way out of it. People think its about accepting the increasing context of limitations in your life, but I think its more than that. You just dont give a shit anymore about so many things. Like going to work and keeping your boss happy. Or where you want to travel on vacation.
- aklemm 9y agoIt would be interesting to hear more people’s experiences with that. It resonates with me already; so many things I cared about no longer matter. It’s not exactly bad, but a little unsettling. Will I eventually care about nothing?