My SO is a HR manager, many times as a screen for tech roles. It's interesting hearing it from the other side. She's a brick wall with regards to sensitive job

My SO is a HR manager, many times as a screen for tech roles. It's interesting hearing it from the other side. She's a brick wall with regards to sensitive job information that lie past her scope of knowledge. She just won't release it. She says the same thing as you however: if you want the good stuff, you have to attack the social vulnerabilities of tech people. They generally aren't trained to know what to say or not to say past the obvious. With carefully constructed questions, you can often get the information you're after.