4 ms·

Just another anecdote, but mine is a fully different experience. As a 6'1 white male, I find that I can walk most anywhere without fear. I often find that I n

Just another anecdote, but mine is a fully different experience. As a 6'1 white male, I find that I can walk most anywhere without fear. I often find that I need to reassess my privileged notion that this is normal when conversing with friends who are shorter, darker or female. They describe a world much like the author of this piece does. That's not to say I've never had trouble on the street. Years ago I was assaulted randomly by someone bigger than me stumbling out of a bar I was passing by. The difference was made clear though when I reacted by getting up and following at a distance, eventually finding a helpful police officer who never questioned my version of events. A vastly more common scenario is one where I am never in any fear of any kind, I can easily wave at police, and am never interrogated for simply walking.

DoreenMichele 9y ago
I often find that I need to reassess my privileged notion that this is normal when conversing with friends who are shorter, darker or female. I'm about 5'8" and female.* Except for the phenomenon I mentioned in another comment of being hassled for Walking While Homeless, I feel fairly comfortable walking almost any time, almost anywhere. I don't have an explanation for that. But it makes me wonder about what all factors into the equation, both from the perspective of how others react and from the perspective of how people experience such things. * And white, which I didn't state because the default assumption is that if you don't state your race/color, then you are white. But I am adding it as a footnote because I am finding myself uncomfortable with reinforcing an essentially racist cultural practice.
- mercer 9y ago
  Speaking from my own experience, there's a degree of 'blending in' that is distinct from the more obvious race/gender/affluence 'visible' factors, and more to do with behavior. I've spent quite a bit of time in various dangerous neighborhoods, cities in general and other parts of the world. In quite a few of these places I should stand out and/or be a target, being a scrawny/weak and very white person. Yet somehow, I can count on one hand the number of times I've actually run into trouble. What's even stranger is that quite a few of the locals I'd spend time with would be bothered or even robbed during my stay with them. The only thing I can point to that was different about these locals was that they (understandably) had a bigger fear of 'the streets', were raised in a much more sheltered way than I was, and just stuck out like a sore thumb in the way they carried themselves. I've experienced a few occasions where, for example, the local's insistence on crossing the street to avoid trouble actually drew attention. Or they'd pull out their fancy phone right in sight of a group of 'loitering youth'. Or stop and act like they didn't know where they were going. Or make (fearful) eye contact. etc. Could be maybe you're also better at the way you 'carry' yourself, aside from other factors that might make you blend in or stand out?
  - DoreenMichele 9y ago
    Could be maybe you're also better at the way you 'carry' yourself This is possible. I come from a multicultural background. I never entirely fit in anywhere, so I always feel a little "alien," yet I am not easily intimidated, I generally like people and I am comfortable socializing with all kinds of people. I certainly don't actively broadcast that I'm scared, and I actively downplay any special privilege or assets that I have which might make me a target.
prawn 9y ago
I don't know the PIN for my main credit card. I can use PayWave here in AU for anything under $100. When racking up more than $100, I say "I don't know my PIN. Can we put that through as x purchases instead?" or I make up something about needing to split payments for business receipt purposes. I've never been asked for ID or had anything other than the staff member accommodate without hesitation. I haven't needed my PIN in years now. But every time, I think, "I bet I wouldn't get away with this if I wasn't a plain white guy."

DoreenMichele 9y ago

I often find that I need to reassess my privileged notion that this is normal when conversing with friends who are shorter, darker or female. I'm about 5'8" and female.* Except for the phenomenon I mentioned in another comment of being hassled for Walking While Homeless, I feel fairly comfortable walking almost any time, almost anywhere. I don't have an explanation for that. But it makes me wonder about what all factors into the equation, both from the perspective of how others react and from the perspective of how people experience such things. * And white, which I didn't state because the default assumption is that if you don't state your race/color, then you are white. But I am adding it as a footnote because I am finding myself uncomfortable with reinforcing an essentially racist cultural practice.

mercer 9y ago
Speaking from my own experience, there's a degree of 'blending in' that is distinct from the more obvious race/gender/affluence 'visible' factors, and more to do with behavior. I've spent quite a bit of time in various dangerous neighborhoods, cities in general and other parts of the world. In quite a few of these places I should stand out and/or be a target, being a scrawny/weak and very white person. Yet somehow, I can count on one hand the number of times I've actually run into trouble. What's even stranger is that quite a few of the locals I'd spend time with would be bothered or even robbed during my stay with them. The only thing I can point to that was different about these locals was that they (understandably) had a bigger fear of 'the streets', were raised in a much more sheltered way than I was, and just stuck out like a sore thumb in the way they carried themselves. I've experienced a few occasions where, for example, the local's insistence on crossing the street to avoid trouble actually drew attention. Or they'd pull out their fancy phone right in sight of a group of 'loitering youth'. Or stop and act like they didn't know where they were going. Or make (fearful) eye contact. etc. Could be maybe you're also better at the way you 'carry' yourself, aside from other factors that might make you blend in or stand out?
- DoreenMichele 9y ago
  Could be maybe you're also better at the way you 'carry' yourself This is possible. I come from a multicultural background. I never entirely fit in anywhere, so I always feel a little "alien," yet I am not easily intimidated, I generally like people and I am comfortable socializing with all kinds of people. I certainly don't actively broadcast that I'm scared, and I actively downplay any special privilege or assets that I have which might make me a target.

prawn 9y ago

I don't know the PIN for my main credit card. I can use PayWave here in AU for anything under $100. When racking up more than $100, I say "I don't know my PIN. Can we put that through as x purchases instead?" or I make up something about needing to split payments for business receipt purposes. I've never been asked for ID or had anything other than the staff member accommodate without hesitation. I haven't needed my PIN in years now. But every time, I think, "I bet I wouldn't get away with this if I wasn't a plain white guy."