4 ms·

I would identify as how the author describes, someone who's slightly nervous at the sight of a black male walking towards him at night. I try to suppress this f

I would identify as how the author describes, someone who's slightly nervous at the sight of a black male walking towards him at night. I try to suppress this feeling, and try to act normal, at which point I'm really overthinking. And I'm sorry. I am sorry that this has happened to you and to black people in general, how as a society we have fucked up so much. I am suddenly reminded of the book "The Lathe of Heaven", in which when the protagonist wishes a world without racism, and everyone turns grey-skinned. I wish there were immediate solutions, and a way to not let this drag on for generations.

acjohnson55 8y ago
Thank you for saying this. The fact is, as a black male, I sometimes feel prejudice against black males while walking at night. And I'm someone who is affected by that very same prejudice. I see all the same media as anyone else, which constantly portrays black men as a menace to society. Is a random black man actually more dangerous than a non-black man, in real life? I have my doubts. But for argument's sake, let's say it's true to a slight extent. That still means a given black man bares very little actual risk. Yet, what sort of psychological damage is done to us by being repeatedly subject to this treatment? It's an invisible tax we pay. I've been fortunate my whole life for so many reasons, but I have my own stories, like most other black men I know. I feel other types of prejudice too. I think step one is knowing this, step two is empathizing, and step three is advocating.
- simonh 8y ago
  In the area where I live there aren't very many coloured people. When I (rarely) walk at night I find myself estimating the social category of people. If I see a young man in sweat pants and a baseball cap, I think 'possible Chav' (low class white person here in the UK) and I'm wary. Low income young men are more likely to be a possible source of trouble. I think in the UK and US since black people are far more likely to be in a low income category than not, race becomes a proxy for that. Funnily enough, when I see a black person in the street at night here I'm more likely to have a positive attitude. Most of the coloured people living round here do so because they are quite successful. Also because there aren't many black people, such a person is perhaps more likely to feel out of place or potentially feel threatened or need help.
  - faitswulff 8y ago
    > aren't very many coloured people Highly recommend using "people of colour," instead.
    - simonh 8y ago
      Fair enough, but that's more of an Americanism. It's not really used here in the UK.
      - twic 8y ago
        It's pretty unusual to say "coloured people" here in the UK, too. I usually phrase it something like "people who aren't white", clumsy though that is.
spraak 8y ago
Well, being aware of it is a great first step. Transformation from there arises from the awareness.
majewsky 8y ago
I know the feeling. Where I live (in East Germany), there are now a lot more immigrants/refugees from the Middle East and Africa then there used to be a few years ago. I noticed that when I'm sitting in the tram next to a group of immigrants, my lizard brain evokes a feeling of unease because it's an unfamiliar situation (I don't know any people from this ethnic group in person, I don't understand their language(s), and so on), and I have to make a deliberate effort to override that. Not that I tolerate it, but I can see why people tend to be resentful against foreigners on a psychological level.
- dudul 8y ago
  > I don't understand their language(s) I remember reading an article a few years ago explaining how one's brain tends to react somewhat negatively when hearing somebody speaking a language they don't understand. It's actually "normal" (as in "good luck fighting thousands of years of evolution") to feel unease when around people speaking a language you don't understand. Funnily, the paper was also mentioning that the same thing happens when hearing somebody talk over the phone. The fact that you can only hear 1/2 of the conversation somehow triggers some defense mechanism in your brain.
zuminator 8y ago
I think it's inevitable that people will form snap judgments about others based on appearance. It's human nature. Where we rise above our nature is in making sure we don't act in those judgments to bring harm to others. Suspicion of mysterious (black) man at night, OK. Crossing the street to avoid unpredictable confrontation? Maybe unwarranted, but OK. Preemptively calling the cops on him, not OK. Shooting him first "just in case," not OK.

acjohnson55 8y ago

Thank you for saying this. The fact is, as a black male, I sometimes feel prejudice against black males while walking at night. And I'm someone who is affected by that very same prejudice. I see all the same media as anyone else, which constantly portrays black men as a menace to society. Is a random black man actually more dangerous than a non-black man, in real life? I have my doubts. But for argument's sake, let's say it's true to a slight extent. That still means a given black man bares very little actual risk. Yet, what sort of psychological damage is done to us by being repeatedly subject to this treatment? It's an invisible tax we pay. I've been fortunate my whole life for so many reasons, but I have my own stories, like most other black men I know. I feel other types of prejudice too. I think step one is knowing this, step two is empathizing, and step three is advocating.

simonh 8y ago
In the area where I live there aren't very many coloured people. When I (rarely) walk at night I find myself estimating the social category of people. If I see a young man in sweat pants and a baseball cap, I think 'possible Chav' (low class white person here in the UK) and I'm wary. Low income young men are more likely to be a possible source of trouble. I think in the UK and US since black people are far more likely to be in a low income category than not, race becomes a proxy for that. Funnily enough, when I see a black person in the street at night here I'm more likely to have a positive attitude. Most of the coloured people living round here do so because they are quite successful. Also because there aren't many black people, such a person is perhaps more likely to feel out of place or potentially feel threatened or need help.
- faitswulff 8y ago
  > aren't very many coloured people Highly recommend using "people of colour," instead.
  - simonh 8y ago
    Fair enough, but that's more of an Americanism. It's not really used here in the UK.
    - twic 8y ago
      It's pretty unusual to say "coloured people" here in the UK, too. I usually phrase it something like "people who aren't white", clumsy though that is.

spraak 8y ago

Well, being aware of it is a great first step. Transformation from there arises from the awareness.

majewsky 8y ago

I know the feeling. Where I live (in East Germany), there are now a lot more immigrants/refugees from the Middle East and Africa then there used to be a few years ago. I noticed that when I'm sitting in the tram next to a group of immigrants, my lizard brain evokes a feeling of unease because it's an unfamiliar situation (I don't know any people from this ethnic group in person, I don't understand their language(s), and so on), and I have to make a deliberate effort to override that. Not that I tolerate it, but I can see why people tend to be resentful against foreigners on a psychological level.

dudul 8y ago
> I don't understand their language(s) I remember reading an article a few years ago explaining how one's brain tends to react somewhat negatively when hearing somebody speaking a language they don't understand. It's actually "normal" (as in "good luck fighting thousands of years of evolution") to feel unease when around people speaking a language you don't understand. Funnily, the paper was also mentioning that the same thing happens when hearing somebody talk over the phone. The fact that you can only hear 1/2 of the conversation somehow triggers some defense mechanism in your brain.

zuminator 8y ago

I think it's inevitable that people will form snap judgments about others based on appearance. It's human nature. Where we rise above our nature is in making sure we don't act in those judgments to bring harm to others. Suspicion of mysterious (black) man at night, OK. Crossing the street to avoid unpredictable confrontation? Maybe unwarranted, but OK. Preemptively calling the cops on him, not OK. Shooting him first "just in case," not OK.