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Dating/marriage outside of your economic upbringing presents some difficult challenges that should not be trivialized. I don't think it's unreasonable to want
by bstar77 9y ago
Dating/marriage outside of your economic upbringing presents some difficult challenges that should not be trivialized. I don't think it's unreasonable to want to date someone that has a similar background to you. Relationships are much easier when you are with someone who share similar economic backgrounds and religious beliefs.
- magduf 9y agoI agree completely. Been there, done that. Never again will I date someone from a a different socioeconomic class or who has any significant religious beliefs. I tried being open-minded and it was a disaster.
- simias 9y agoWas the issue the socioeconomic class or the religious beliefs? I can see how different religious beliefs can be a very practical issue but it seems like socioeconomic class is a little less "dogmatic" and it would be easier to find a middle ground? That being said I can't really give life lessons here, I don't think I ever dated anybody outside of my "socioeconomic class", whatever that is.
- magduf 9y agoBoth, but the socioeconomic thing really killed it more than the religion. With religion, at least you can agree to disagree usually. But in a marriage, finances are shared to some extent, and you just can't get past that. When one partner is frugal and manages money carefully, and the other thinks "we're making all this money! why can't I spend it on xyz/tithe to my church/buy expensive gifts for my family/etc.?" the results won't be good.
- bstar77 9y agoI understand this scenario completely, but I was able to make it work with my wife (who grew up very poor). Ironically, many people that grow up poor seem to not realize that many people who have money tend to be frugal with it- that's it's not a sign of weakness to be frugal. My wife and I are on the same page now-a-days (I definitely learned some things from her as well), but it was a struggle for a while hence why I don't think it's good to trivialize in the name of social equality.
- magduf 9y agoI tried too, but finally gave up. We just couldn't see eye-to-eye on it, and I am not willing to try again. My new girlfriend comes from an entirely different culture geographically, but has extremely similar money-management practices as me, even though she didn't grow up in the same country (though it was also a rich first-world nation). There's challenges with her too, but finances aren't one of them.
- justboxing 9y ago> Dating/marriage outside of your economic upbringing presents some difficult challenges that should not be trivialized Except if you are a Sugar Daddy looking to pamper a Sugar Baby....