Perhaps what she is suggesting is the exact opposite of what you're describing: trying to actually, intentionally speak to another person without it being the p

Perhaps what she is suggesting is the exact opposite of what you're describing: trying to actually, intentionally speak to another person without it being the prelude to something (sex, social media post about "Look at the fun we're having", etc). When we see each other as inputs to a transaction, something has been lost. There should be joy from interpersonal contact.