4 ms·

It's pretty odd that a man would lie about being a virgin, but I suppose that's the western perspective.

brandall10 8y ago
Presumably ~half the people surveyed were women, and being unmarried that might be a position they'd like to hold onto. That said, it seems like this has been a recurring theme in stories about Japanese youth I've seen in recent years, that asexuality is becoming a thing.
- Jemmeh 8y ago
  Just to be clear chastity and asexuality are not the same thing. A chaste person experiences sexual attraction but chooses not to act on it. An asexual person doesn't experience (or experiences very little) sexual attraction in the first place.
  - brandall10 8y ago
    Clear about the distinction - I definitely meant asexuality. They appear to lack interest, or at least that's the impression I've gotten.
    - nexus2045 8y ago
      I think I seen a lot of asexuality in say, women in CS, or those who grow up under stricter Asian parenting in general, not having the time to ever "go out" or enjoy nightlife. This might be a minority of girls (most eventually try to put on makeup, be more sexually attractive, date around), but could still anecdotally constitute 10-20% of girls just based on what I've observed on university campuses. These are the kind of girls that totally don't sexually signal in a visual manner, have almost never dated, somewhat shy, sheepish around any sign of a sexual topic.
      - Jemmeh 8y ago
        As an Asian woman in CS...I really don't see that as a lack of attraction (they'll talk about it with other ladies) so much as a just raised to not talk about it too openly and especially with men. At least here (USA) women in general also get a lot of shit in general for appearing sexual(What a slut, so easy, etc). But I feel like it's worse in most of the Asian families I know in a "you are ruined forever!" way and in a "focus on your studies/career!" way. Seriously have had my own family call me a ho for wearing lipstick and 2 inch heels lul. Ya still feel the feels, you just don't express it. On the other hand I have been meeting more people who say "it's not worth the hassle" for various reasons even if they experience sexual attraction. I've heard a lot of people say it's not worth all that effort.
      - watwut 8y ago
        Being asexual and not being interested in night life are faaar from each other. Like, absurdly ridiculously far. For that matter, self control, ability to control impulses, introversion or being goal oriented does not make you asexual. Not does preference for sex only in context of long term relationship. Nor does modesty in clothing. (RELATED immodesty in clothing does not imply sex with random dudes nor interest in it. Pretty important.) Evangelical coservative white girls are not asexual either. They do however have opinions about when to sex, who to have sex and when not to. Edit: also, asexual people do enjoy nightlife and dancing and can wear sexy cloth. They don't care about sex part, but they do care about fun to similar extend as sexual people. After all, many sexual girls like to dance and want to dance, but did not came dance because they desperately seek sex.
        watwut 8y ago
        This is one of those occasions where I would prefer people to explain what they disagree on rather then downvote. As far as I am concerned, what I wrote is common sense and consistent with all I know about a.) asexuality b.) normal human behavior in 21 century. By normal I mean both people who like night dancing and people who don't.
        Jemmeh 8y ago
Xixi 8y ago
There are also two concepts of being a virgin in Japan: never had sex at all, or only had sex with prostitutes. Depending on how you ask the question, a man who had sex with prostitutes might still answer that he is a virgin.
- astrange 8y ago
  Yeah, I was thinking that was one reason to lie.

Presumably ~half the people surveyed were women, and being unmarried that might be a position they'd like to hold onto. That said, it seems like this has been a recurring theme in stories about Japanese youth I've seen in recent years, that asexuality is becoming a thing.

Jemmeh 8y ago
Just to be clear chastity and asexuality are not the same thing. A chaste person experiences sexual attraction but chooses not to act on it. An asexual person doesn't experience (or experiences very little) sexual attraction in the first place.
- brandall10 8y ago
  Clear about the distinction - I definitely meant asexuality. They appear to lack interest, or at least that's the impression I've gotten.
  - nexus2045 8y ago
    I think I seen a lot of asexuality in say, women in CS, or those who grow up under stricter Asian parenting in general, not having the time to ever "go out" or enjoy nightlife. This might be a minority of girls (most eventually try to put on makeup, be more sexually attractive, date around), but could still anecdotally constitute 10-20% of girls just based on what I've observed on university campuses. These are the kind of girls that totally don't sexually signal in a visual manner, have almost never dated, somewhat shy, sheepish around any sign of a sexual topic.
    - Jemmeh 8y ago
      As an Asian woman in CS...I really don't see that as a lack of attraction (they'll talk about it with other ladies) so much as a just raised to not talk about it too openly and especially with men. At least here (USA) women in general also get a lot of shit in general for appearing sexual(What a slut, so easy, etc). But I feel like it's worse in most of the Asian families I know in a "you are ruined forever!" way and in a "focus on your studies/career!" way. Seriously have had my own family call me a ho for wearing lipstick and 2 inch heels lul. Ya still feel the feels, you just don't express it. On the other hand I have been meeting more people who say "it's not worth the hassle" for various reasons even if they experience sexual attraction. I've heard a lot of people say it's not worth all that effort.
    - watwut 8y ago
      Being asexual and not being interested in night life are faaar from each other. Like, absurdly ridiculously far. For that matter, self control, ability to control impulses, introversion or being goal oriented does not make you asexual. Not does preference for sex only in context of long term relationship. Nor does modesty in clothing. (RELATED immodesty in clothing does not imply sex with random dudes nor interest in it. Pretty important.) Evangelical coservative white girls are not asexual either. They do however have opinions about when to sex, who to have sex and when not to. Edit: also, asexual people do enjoy nightlife and dancing and can wear sexy cloth. They don't care about sex part, but they do care about fun to similar extend as sexual people. After all, many sexual girls like to dance and want to dance, but did not came dance because they desperately seek sex.
      - watwut 8y ago
        This is one of those occasions where I would prefer people to explain what they disagree on rather then downvote. As far as I am concerned, what I wrote is common sense and consistent with all I know about a.) asexuality b.) normal human behavior in 21 century. By normal I mean both people who like night dancing and people who don't.
        Jemmeh 8y ago

Xixi 8y ago

There are also two concepts of being a virgin in Japan: never had sex at all, or only had sex with prostitutes. Depending on how you ask the question, a man who had sex with prostitutes might still answer that he is a virgin.

astrange 8y ago
Yeah, I was thinking that was one reason to lie.