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Some thoughts from someone who recently became an "old" person. Around turning 50 I suddenly realized that my life will probably be always somewhat similar to w
by maxxxxx 9y ago
Some thoughts from someone who recently became an "old" person. Around turning 50 I suddenly realized that my life will probably be always somewhat similar to what it is now. The big ambitions and dreams are gone so I don't feel that much pressure to achieve anymore. Also at that age the options to change one's life are pretty limited compared to being in your 20s. Which makes me much more content compared to when I was younger. I have also accepted that I will die some day.
I don't think younger people should adopt that mindset necessarily. It's good to have ambition while you are young but maybe you shouldn't listen too much to other people. In the end being young is hard. There are so many options for living your life but there is no way to tell which one will be right for you. So there is a lot of luck involved. Some people pick the right path. Many don't.
- cmod 9y agoFor an archetype of the anti-sentiment to your post, I highly recommend the autobiography of Donald Keene, renown translator of Japanese literature: Chronicles of my Life: An American in the Heart of Japan [0]. He never stops working on the next project, biting off the next book. It's an inspiring life of rich and endless output, lived in such a gentle (almost heartbreaking) way. [0] https://amzn.to/2GZk0Am https://amzn.to/2GZk0Am
- stewbrew 9y agoThere's a difference between never stop working and living as if you would never die or having to invent a new life. As a young person you probably still have to find out who you really are and you tend to see time to live as an unlimited resource.
- crispinb 9y ago50 is not old (it's not even "old").
- maxxxxx 9y agoIt's old enough to realize that I am not young anymore :-)
- hengheng 9y agoMan, I feel the same as you at thirty. And honestly I've never been better.
- simlevesque 9y agoYou must be old to say this. It's not that old, but it still is.
- crispinb 9y agoI’ve thought (and said) that since I was about 18 ;)
- Clubber 9y agoThe best way to not feel old is hang around people who are older.
- ams6110 9y agoI'm past 50. I think it's kind of getting old. My hair (what there is left of it) is getting gray, my skin is not as supple, that sort of thing. It doesn't bother me. But, I still feel like "me" and not really any different from when I was 25.
- fao_ 9y ago> Also at that age the options to change one's life are pretty limited compared to being in your 20s. A second cousin of mine in his 40s, 50s works at a factory. He did a classics course through the Open University. He still works at the factory, because he likes the work, but he was more than able to do the course, and he felt that he was more prepared for the coursework at that age than if he had done it earlier. For most people, the options are still there, you're just less likely to see them as an option. Never underestimate your potential later in life. As long as you maintain your levels of exercise and take care of your body, you are on average just as capable to change careers as you were when you were twenty. As a secondary source, there was recently an Ask Hacker News thread of people who had started their programming careers in their fifties, I sadly cannot find the like :c
- maxxxxx 9y ago" you are on average just as capable to change careers as you were when you were twenty." Maybe you are capable but the job market is much less welcoming in your 50s compared to being in your 20s especially if you are trying to get into something new. You certainly can learn new things though. No doubt.
- chrisweekly 9y agoTrying to get a traditional employer to hire you is a radically different proposition than entrepreneurship -- which holds vastly more appeal for older people, who are possibly wiser, and probably more financially secure, than their younger selves.
- jacquesm 9y agoThe job market is never very welcoming there is always going to be a lot of competition, either from peers or from abroad. I stopped being employable somewhere in my early 20's and I still think that is the best thing that happened to me. It made me think of life not in terms of jobs but in terms of capabilities. You can learn new things and you can pick up new marketable skills and change careers. I did it when I was 42, I see no reason why it could not be done at 50 or older. In fact I know a couple of nice examples of people older than 50 that made radical (and lucrative) career changes. It's really up to you, your appetite for risk and how much energy you can muster. At 50+ you probably have an advantage over 20 year olds trying to do the same except for the energy factor.
- komali2 9y ago>I have also accepted that I will die one day How? I'm only 27 but every time I try to tackle this problem raw panic prevents any reasonable thinking. I've instead adopted a "when it happens I won't know" mindset and continue to work towards extracting maximum enjoyment from life.
- MrLeap 9y agoI'm 29 and comfortable with the thought of dying. Not looking forward to it, but not frightened either. The "how" is just like anything else, practice. Since you can only die once, you have to rely on the deaths of others you care about to help you over your fear. When I was in third grade, one of my brothers was murdered. I felt all the panic of mortality, and intense, visceral grief -- etc that you might imagine. A few years after that, a cousin was stabbed to death. I didn't know him much, and I figured that was the reason why his funeral felt much easier. My grandmother died in 2007, she was the sweetest lady you'd ever meet. It was even "easier" than the cousin's funeral. In 2009, an uncle died. In 2010, an aunt. Another aunt died in 2013. Another one of my brothers always used to say that he never wanted a funeral. When he died October 2016, some family threw him a funeral anyways. I felt like I was doing his memory a solid by not going. At an earlier stage in my life, when I was more self important -- I would have been livid at the family who threw a funeral for someone who didn't want one in life. Now I know stuff like that just doesn't matter. The pain of losing a loved one has changed from an acute stabbing sensation in my kidneys to somber waves that roll over me, then recede. Getting better at coping with the deaths of those you love helps you come to terms with your own mortality. Basically, don't worry about it.
- hodgesrm 9y agoI don't agree with the proposition that you should give up ambition or hope of changing the world just because you get older. One of my childhood heroes was Plutarch's Timoleon, a famous Corinthian general who decisively defeated the Carthaginians in Sicily in 339 BC and freed the Greek cities of that region from their tyrants. [0] He was over 70 when he did so. By Plutarch's account at least he accomplished little of note before embarking on the campaign in Sicily but at that point turned out to be an outstanding strategist as well as politician. We live a long time. I have 12 years to go before reaching 70 and still hope to live up to Timoleon's example. [0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Timoleon https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Timoleon
- kilroy123 9y agoI agree completely. My aunt, well my great aunt actually, is 93. She is literally more active than me! She goes bowling, still, drives, volunteers, goes to church, and visits family and friends often. She is still very with it mentally, but I will admit after 90 she has declined mentally a bit. My point is, this woman has touched a lot of people's lives within her 'old' age. She helped my family out a lot at one point. She's spent decades volunteering. She's been there for a lot of people and IMO helped to make the world a slightly better place in her own way. It's never too late.
- proee 9y agoThis is a downright depressing read. You probably have more talent and money than any previous time in your life, yet you're ready to watch the sun set and don't have any reason to dream and your drive is gone? Is there not a dozen things on your "bucket list" that still need checked off? Sounds like you're more comfortable then you've ever been, but does your comfort translate into true happiness?
- oliv__ 9y agoI disagree. I don't see why you always have to do more to be happy. What more do you know about happiness than this guy? If he's satisfied with his life, that sounds pretty close to happiness me
- proee 9y agoAs citizens of earth, we should never stop dreaming and having huge ambitions. We're on the shoulders of people that dreamed of having things better. We're programmed by modern society to be consumers and not producers. Surely there is more happiness in waking up each day and working toward fulfilling your dreams?
- halhen 9y agoThis seems like a young persons fallacy. Why would consumerism be the only reason to drop ambitions? How about acceptance and finding peace? Growing into yourself and seeing your role differently? I study a lot and perform well at work, but nowadays I would absolutely say it's not from ambition. Instead, it's from me enjoying to play that character in the game of life. If modern society taught us a fallacy, it is to consider being content as something bad when, in fact, I can think of no better goal to die, and live, happy. Taking the road via accomplishments to get there is not necessarily the most likely way to get there.
- andromedaworld 9y ago> This seems like a young persons fallacy Yes, and I think there's a lot of value in naiveté especially when pursuing immensely challenging opportunities. I just don't see how you can get out of bed otherwise because most important things are really hard to do.
- jv22222 9y agoI recently turned 49. I honestly don't feel any less ambition than I ever have. Every day I wake up and feel like I'm just getting started on most things. I'm enjoying coding as much as I always have. I want to build a succesfull business just like I always have. I pretty much feel exactly the same as I did wen I was in my 30s. I guess the one difference is a large part of my ambitions these days is about helping other people, when I was younger it was all about me.
- Lio 9y agoRegardless of what you might think of their “food” or business ethics one aspect of the history of McDonalds I always found interesting is that Ray Kroc started the his version of the company when he was 64. I always found that inspirational. That at that age he still had the ambition and energy to do that. At the very least it stands as evidence that you can still work productively or change your life at any age if you want to.
- weinzierl 9y agoThe history of KFC is similarly inspiring. Colonel Sanders franchised Kentucky Fried Chicken for the first time when he was 62 expanded the company enormously over the following twelve years and and after selling it worked for it another 16 years.
- minikites 9y agoWallace Stevens was an insurance executive who didn't become a poet until much later in life: > Stevens was financially independent as an insurance executive earning by the mid-1930s "$20,000 a year, equivalent to about $350,000 today (2016). > By late February of 1947 with Stevens approaching 67 years of age, it became apparent that Stevens had completed the most productive ten years of his life in writing poetry.
- trentnelson 9y agoDave Cutler got a call from Bill Gates to build a next generation OS when he was 47! Circa 1988-89.
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- kudokatz 9y ago> The big ambitions and dreams are gone so I don't feel that much pressure to achieve anymore. Also at that age the options to change one's life are pretty limited compared to being in your 20s. I would like to respectfully disagree. While I am not "old", I'm on my way. I am actually super on-board with simply removing a desire to achieve, and it has made me much happier. But I'm achieving all sorts of things anyways. The second part of this is the assertion that options to change decrease with age. I have found exactly the opposite. As I gain more experience, build a solid chest towards an exceptionally early financial independence, and go out to find more like-minded but different people I tend to feel like options to change and expand my life start exploding in a way that requires picking and choosing more and more carefully between different things. What do you think about the reduction of "ambition" as a helpful thing being replaced with a calm but strong "passion" as a potentially more positive alternative?
- amalgameate 9y ago> Some people pick the right path. Many don't. Is there really a right or wrong path to take? I thought one thing that happens as you get older is you realize there was never a right or wrong path to be taken. But, what do I know, I'm still young.