3 ms·

A pleasant essay, but I think it is a bit dismissive of the situations people are in. A simple example is the teenagers he mentions. You can't help but worry

A pleasant essay, but I think it is a bit dismissive of the situations people are in. A simple example is the teenagers he mentions. You can't help but worry a ton about what people think about you as a teenager - your "social subprocess" has just kicked on, and you are overwhelmed by a great number of new senses and feelings. Telling a teenager not to worry about things does nothing but make everything worse. I can come up to you and inject you with adrenaline and nothing you do (short of medical intervention) will make you feel calm, and certainly me telling you to "just calm down" isn't going to help. The essay is well intended, and well written as usual, I just have an issue with the underlying assumption that people can simply change everything as desired.

projektir 9y ago
What's funny is that it's not like anyone is teaching teenagers proper coping mechanisms. They don't come up on their own. Knowing how not to worry about things is exactly that. Hell, I still worry...
- gilbetron 9y ago
  I think there are more coping mechanisms being taught these days than when I was a teen (I'm only slightly younger than Graham), but I agree with your point overall. We try to teach our son (9) that you can't prevent feelings, and it's ok to let yourself feel them, but that we can find ways to respond to our feelings. He's young, so we'll see how it works out, but it's what my mother taught me and it works ok. My wife's mother taught her to basically step on her feelings and suppress them. She has lots of anxiety/depression issues as a direct result.
2ion 9y ago
It's the gospel of someone who experienced, by common standards, extreme success. No more, no less. I find his essays mostly to be opinion pieces without exceptional insights or conclusions that would make them stand out if they were not attached to his persona.
- aaron-lebo 9y ago
  I still enjoy reading some of his stuff, but over the years I've realized that most of his writing lacks any rigor or evidence for what he says. He'd be a much better writer if it weren't for the way people read his good and usually thoughtful writing and take it for truth. This happens as you say due to him being successful, which I find kind of pernicious. I've found some of his stuff in hindsight simply wrong, but he'll never go back and correct it, nor will people listen to criticism. My only wish was he was more cognizant of this and wrote accordingly, but his writing has gotten less rigorous and more flowery over the years, not less. It's a real problem across tech. I've read some comments on HN describing tech as devoid of culture, which has some truth to it, but the bigger issue is we don't really care about evidence, and that comes from the top.
  - pm90 9y ago
    I've actually noticed that too. I remember reading his articles from the early days of HN and being enamored by their insights... mad respect. But then he tweeted something along the lines of "There's no Uber or Lyft here in Austin, Texas. How do I get anywhere?!" (Uber and Lyft had left Austin at the time) which fundamentally changed my view of the guy.
- gilbetron 9y ago
  I think his, and Spolsky's, writings are fine, and actually have some insights, but often have a lot of cruft around them. It's kinda like the internet condensed ;)

projektir 9y ago

What's funny is that it's not like anyone is teaching teenagers proper coping mechanisms. They don't come up on their own. Knowing how not to worry about things is exactly that. Hell, I still worry...

gilbetron 9y ago
I think there are more coping mechanisms being taught these days than when I was a teen (I'm only slightly younger than Graham), but I agree with your point overall. We try to teach our son (9) that you can't prevent feelings, and it's ok to let yourself feel them, but that we can find ways to respond to our feelings. He's young, so we'll see how it works out, but it's what my mother taught me and it works ok. My wife's mother taught her to basically step on her feelings and suppress them. She has lots of anxiety/depression issues as a direct result.

2ion 9y ago

It's the gospel of someone who experienced, by common standards, extreme success. No more, no less. I find his essays mostly to be opinion pieces without exceptional insights or conclusions that would make them stand out if they were not attached to his persona.

aaron-lebo 9y ago
I still enjoy reading some of his stuff, but over the years I've realized that most of his writing lacks any rigor or evidence for what he says. He'd be a much better writer if it weren't for the way people read his good and usually thoughtful writing and take it for truth. This happens as you say due to him being successful, which I find kind of pernicious. I've found some of his stuff in hindsight simply wrong, but he'll never go back and correct it, nor will people listen to criticism. My only wish was he was more cognizant of this and wrote accordingly, but his writing has gotten less rigorous and more flowery over the years, not less. It's a real problem across tech. I've read some comments on HN describing tech as devoid of culture, which has some truth to it, but the bigger issue is we don't really care about evidence, and that comes from the top.
- pm90 9y ago
  I've actually noticed that too. I remember reading his articles from the early days of HN and being enamored by their insights... mad respect. But then he tweeted something along the lines of "There's no Uber or Lyft here in Austin, Texas. How do I get anywhere?!" (Uber and Lyft had left Austin at the time) which fundamentally changed my view of the guy.
gilbetron 9y ago
I think his, and Spolsky's, writings are fine, and actually have some insights, but often have a lot of cruft around them. It's kinda like the internet condensed ;)