It's the "eyes open" part of this that matters. Opinions and personal desires can't be argued with, but my experience is that a lot of people are plainly ignora

It's the "eyes open" part of this that matters. Opinions and personal desires can't be argued with, but my experience is that a lot of people are plainly ignorant of basic facts about a lot of the U.S. If you're staying in the SFBA because you imagine, say, the Midwest to have no culture and no jobs and no future, then I'd propose that you're operating on incorrect information (not just subjective feelings). Software developers are very well paid in the middle of the country. And every medium-sized American city is (more or less) a liberal outpost, with gay bars and music festivals and meetups and tech scenes and Wolfpack Hustles and craft beer and on and on, even in what many imagine to be farm country. Look, I get it, I live in NYC now, because I wanted that experience and I was willing to pay for it. But I'm not here because I think Cincinnati or St. Louis or Nashville are culturally-deficient wastelands with nothing going for them. I think folks are really underestimating what kind of life they could be living by leaving the most expensive parts of the country behind. If you're in your 20s and dating? Sheesh, by all means, pay to experience the wonders of San Francisco or NYC. But if what you want is a family and kids, then you owe it to yourself to know what your options are. They're better and more diverse than you might expect.