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Calling a female colleague `babe` is not definitely offensive. Using the word `nigger` is not definitely offensive. Offence is the position the interpreter. ie
by Normal_gaussian 9y ago
Calling a female colleague `babe` is not definitely offensive. Using the word `nigger` is not definitely offensive.
Offence is the position the interpreter. ie offence is taken, not given. This is not to say that offence is not to be expected, nor is it to say the person who offends should be exempted from all repercussions - but it does temper what a reasonable repercussion is (in a society that deems it viable to censor through offence).
It should be noted that words like nigger did not always hold their current offensive status (especially not outside of America) [1].
It should also be noted that words have geographical offense, the term 'lass' was one that I grew up hearing and using - appropriate when referring to a person to their face in an informal manner regardless of age (note that if you don't already know this usage then you are unlikely to be on informal enough terms with someone who would accept it to use it) - yet if I were to say this in the south of England I would be being patronising.
[1] - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nigger#British_usages https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nigger#British_usages
- CrystalLangUser 9y agoI cannot think of any office situation where a man calling a woman a `babe` is acceptable. It’s patronizing at best, and sexist at worst. Note that parent comment specifically said calling a woman that. Not merely using the word itself.
- Normal_gaussian 9y agoI gave some thought as to cultures where it might be acceptable when writing the first comment, but I am a victim to my own experience here and so turn up nothing. I have heard comments that surprised me from women in the small company construction trades, haulage, F1, and darts; I also expect that what was acceptable with respect to `babe` has changed over time. It should be noted that the post I replied to referred to 'calling a female colleague', and you are talking about an 'office situation'. Certain kinds of businesses make less use of offices and hire different kinds of workers - it is not much of a stretch to expect them to harbour different language standards. It is also notable that you introduced the specification of a 'man calling a woman'. This is the situation I had been considering, yet when I open it to women calling women I know I hear the term `babe` used between women at work all the time - I also hear women calling men `babe`.
- CrystalLangUser 9y agoI didn't introduce the specification of a man calling a woman. The parent comment did. Specifically, when a man calls a woman a `babe` or a pet name like that, in my opinion it's a tad sexist, unless they have a friendship close enough for pet names, etc. I also don't think it's appropriate for a woman to call a man a pet name like that either, but in a different sense. I shouldn't have assumed an office environment, but it still stands for the most part. I can't think of any situation where I'd call a colleague `babe`, even if I've known them for many years.
- jdietrich 9y agoIn England, it's quite common to use informal affectionate terms. They vary regionally - love, pet, hinny, babs, duck, cock, hen, flower, petal, princess etc. Their use isn't uncontroversial, but they're widely accepted by a large proportion of the population and frequently used in many offices. https://yougov.co.uk/news/2012/02/08/being-called-babe-offensive/ https://yougov.co.uk/news/2012/02/08/being-called-babe-offen...
- CrystalLangUser 9y agoFair enough, as with most things in life, it's context dependent. I'm speaking from an American perspective, and even in an endearing manner I would never use `babe` because that's something you'd call your significant other. Not a professional colleague.
- vesrah 9y agoAnecdotally, I hear babe from female to male coworkers much more often than the converse. That or 'hon'.
- bfuller 9y agoIts common to use informal affectionate terms in the US too.