3 ms·

I'm a bit of an edge case, I'd presume, because I'm very very social when I want to be. Maybe that's not weird, after all. But at the end of the day, I either a

I'm a bit of an edge case, I'd presume, because I'm very very social when I want to be. Maybe that's not weird, after all. But at the end of the day, I either a) don't go because I don't want to (adult choices!!!) or b) just try to reframe my mental state. Check out a podcast called Good Fortune, episode 1, A Festival. It very briefly addresses this challenge from a stoic's point of view. Worth a listen.

horsecaptin 9y ago
I wanted to add to this because I feel that I'm a beginner at being a stoic and putting value on being alone: - I make choices and I learn from mistakes. I'm trying to be better about not having regrets as in repeatedly reflecting emotionally to mistakes and misfortune in my past. - I try to do things that are important to me when I have the time for them. I'm choosier with what movies I watch, games I play, and the things I do. This beats going to parties sometimes. - I'm honest about why I can't go to a party. I take my feelings out of it - if I am genuinely tired and need rest, then I say that. If I'm sick or have a headache, then that's what I say. If on the other hand I have nothing better to do, and I'm being lazy - I go to the damn party. 9 times out of 10 I end up having more fun than had I not gone.
- jrs235 9y ago
  Ditto. >If on the other hand I have nothing better to do Ah ha! This requires having something planned or desiring to do something at that time. For me rather than phrasing it as "nothing better to do" it comes down to "I don't have any current plans and while I may feel lazy and unmotivated, there's value in socializing with others". And yes, 9 out of 10 times I'm glad I did!
  - horsecaptin 9y ago
    I like it! :)
jrs235 9y ago
>I'm very very social when I want to be. I'm the same. If I want and choose to be social I can be. I can easily be the center attention and a goof ball having silly fun or just a social participant in a social gathering. As I have gotten older I tend to pass more on being center of attention goof ball (it is fun and it is fun laughing with others) and spending more of my time doing things I currently value as being more important.

horsecaptin 9y ago

I wanted to add to this because I feel that I'm a beginner at being a stoic and putting value on being alone: - I make choices and I learn from mistakes. I'm trying to be better about not having regrets as in repeatedly reflecting emotionally to mistakes and misfortune in my past. - I try to do things that are important to me when I have the time for them. I'm choosier with what movies I watch, games I play, and the things I do. This beats going to parties sometimes. - I'm honest about why I can't go to a party. I take my feelings out of it - if I am genuinely tired and need rest, then I say that. If I'm sick or have a headache, then that's what I say. If on the other hand I have nothing better to do, and I'm being lazy - I go to the damn party. 9 times out of 10 I end up having more fun than had I not gone.

jrs235 9y ago
Ditto. >If on the other hand I have nothing better to do Ah ha! This requires having something planned or desiring to do something at that time. For me rather than phrasing it as "nothing better to do" it comes down to "I don't have any current plans and while I may feel lazy and unmotivated, there's value in socializing with others". And yes, 9 out of 10 times I'm glad I did!
- horsecaptin 9y ago
  I like it! :)

jrs235 9y ago

>I'm very very social when I want to be. I'm the same. If I want and choose to be social I can be. I can easily be the center attention and a goof ball having silly fun or just a social participant in a social gathering. As I have gotten older I tend to pass more on being center of attention goof ball (it is fun and it is fun laughing with others) and spending more of my time doing things I currently value as being more important.