I left a lot of that out for mostly privacy and relevancy reasons. I have been contacted by people who recognized me from details in the past and it resulted in

I left a lot of that out for mostly privacy and relevancy reasons. I have been contacted by people who recognized me from details in the past and it resulted in trouble not help so I am defensive and hypersensitive I admit because of this, and many questions being used to "dismantle" what I know I need and argue with me rather than anything helpful. If someone thinks they can truly help I am willing to spill even more in private but I believe the initial post covers the relevant things and states what I need and I took great care to preface lots of stuff. Sorry to all for the slow replies. I got fairly discouraged as the post was apparently flagged several times and turnout was low. I do appreciate everyone's input.