I think its so awesome that you are not only bringing this up on HN, but you also seem to have a genuine desire to be successful. Its probably for a noble idea,

I think its so awesome that you are not only bringing this up on HN, but you also seem to have a genuine desire to be successful. Its probably for a noble idea, perhaps it is to make your parents happy, perhaps it is to improve other people's lives around you? I don't know your goals, but I felt something similar myself a few years ago. Looking back, the main cause of my unhappiness was that my idea of 'success' was what the media depicted: nice house, nice car, big philanthropy initiatives, etc and that wasn't normal. It wasn't normal for me to work hungrily towards financial success. When my friends wanted to hang out, I declined because I was 'too busy trying to change the world'. Eventually, my scope shifted from "changing the world" to helping those around me. I taught a few friends how to code over the years and helped them get jobs. Now we all bought modest houses next to each other and we hangout all the time, volunteering together and teaching more people how to code. I'm much happier now that I have redefined my meaning of success. I hate mainstream media and the unsustainable consumerism and desires it creates. It makes it harder than ever to find yourself. Get off Facebook and other media for awhile, hangout with your friends and family more, and I hope you successfully redefine what success mean on your terms.