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I've lived in Austin for about 5 years. Grad school, not work. My programmer friends seem to have no problem getting jobs, and I have no shortage of male friend

I've lived in Austin for about 5 years. Grad school, not work. My programmer friends seem to have no problem getting jobs, and I have no shortage of male friends, but the gender ratio of singles is pretty heavily skewed towards men for introverted nerds. I'm a single male who doesn't have a lot of free time, so I gave up on dating in Austin. The city doesn't seem to attract many people I'd like to date. Particularly compared against where I lived previously. Many of the people under 35 in Austin seem to have been attracted to the city for the music festivals and relative lack of cold weather. I'm an introvert who finds the summer heat here worse than the cold on the east coast. As I said, Austinites are typically not my kind of people. Something to keep in mind if you believe you might be similar to me. Austin is probably not worse than SF, but I don't intend to live there after I graduate either.

pm90 9y ago
I haven't found that experience at all. In fact one of the reasons I refuse to move to Man Jose or SF is because I've heard of the famously skewed sex ratio. There is a lot more diversity in Austin, and as a single guy in his late 20's I've had a very healthy dating experience.
- justherefortart 9y ago
  SF is a sausage fest without a doubt. Fortunately, there's a lot of sausage on sausage action (if that's your thing :-) I lived in the bay area for ~4 years, lots of dudes, immigrants, and really wealthy people (in addition to a lot of the working poor). Interesting place just not my cup of tea. Did make Buena Vista inspired Irish Coffees last night though.
- throwaway_woxx7 9y ago
  I don't doubt SF, etc., is worse. My experience suggests Austin is a step down from where I lived previously. Perhaps you're more attractive or patient than I am. I also just realized that I forgot to mention that I'm a teetotaler, which seem to be a major turnoff to people here. If you don't mind me asking, how do you meet single women here?
starwind0 9y ago
I've had no shortage of suiters. Granted I say that as a single dude, but I know a few who would date me. MANY more times that of Denver. Just because I know more people because everyone is so friendly. I mean there is a whole university to offset from the software engineers.
- throwaway_woxx7 9y ago
  Maybe age is part of the problem for me. I'm about 10 years older than the undergrads, so they're not really in my dating pool. Most of the dates I've gone on were with fellow graduate students, but I didn't go on many dates before stopping.
  - tropo 9y ago
    The ancient philosopher Plato tells us that the ideal marriage ages are 16 for women and 30 for men. One might suspect that he was 30 at the time, but Plato is quite respected. Consider taking his advice. Biologically it makes sense, leading to large families that can be financially supported.
    - reducesuffering 9y ago
      Consider taking his advice and marrying 16 year olds?
      - mrkstu 9y ago
        I think he's just implying that there isn't any reason to remove the undergrads from the dating pool.
  - antisthenes 9y ago
    If anything, the undergrads should be your only dating pool. Older women come with too many entitlements and strings attached and you're essentially on the clock to start a family with them.
fapjacks 9y ago
Well, there is a big difference between "Austinites" and people that moved to Austin from somewhere else and now make up 4/5ths of the population. I made up that number, but it's not a bad guess. Austin is an east coast city in Texas. Everybody there is from LA or the east coast and brought their road rage and terrible attitudes to Austin. It seems all the actual Austinites are leaving the city for nearby small towns like Dripping Springs, Elgin, Fredricksburg, San Marcos, New Braunsfels, etc. People actually from Austin seem to be way cooler than the people that moved to Austin from somewhere else. No offense to the transplants -- I used to be one and certainly Austinites are way cooler than I am. But I'm guessing they've also looked around and come to the same conclusion like the person here. Austin was probably as cool as they say in the 80s and 90s. Not so much these days.
- Recoveringhobo 9y ago
  > Well, there is a big difference between "Austinites" and people that moved to Austin from somewhere else and now make up 4/5ths of the population. I made up that number, but it's not a bad guess. Austin is an east coast city in Texas. You could say the same thing about SF, Oakland, Portland, LA, Seattle, Boston, New York, etc etc. Name a city with a booming economy in the U.S. that isn't mostly transplants. > Everybody there is from LA or the east coast and brought their road rage and terrible attitudes to Austin. It seems all the actual Austinites are leaving the city for nearby small towns like Dripping Springs, Elgin, Fredricksburg, San Marcos, New Braunsfels, etc. Once again, you could say the same thing about any of the popular cities for young people to move to. I currently live in Seattle and hear people saying the exact same thing all the time. Californians pricing Seattlites out and bringing road rage yada yada. I'm originally from the East Bay and have experienced the exact same gentrification process in my own home town. > People actually from Austin seem to be way cooler than the people that moved to Austin from somewhere else. No offense to the transplants -- I used to be one and certainly Austinites are way cooler than I am. But I'm guessing they've also looked around and come to the same conclusion like the person here. Austin was probably as cool as they say in the 80s and 90s. Not so much these days. I've heard this exact same sentiment online about all the hip cities in the U.S.
  - 9y ago

pm90 9y ago

I haven't found that experience at all. In fact one of the reasons I refuse to move to Man Jose or SF is because I've heard of the famously skewed sex ratio. There is a lot more diversity in Austin, and as a single guy in his late 20's I've had a very healthy dating experience.

justherefortart 9y ago
SF is a sausage fest without a doubt. Fortunately, there's a lot of sausage on sausage action (if that's your thing :-) I lived in the bay area for ~4 years, lots of dudes, immigrants, and really wealthy people (in addition to a lot of the working poor). Interesting place just not my cup of tea. Did make Buena Vista inspired Irish Coffees last night though.
throwaway_woxx7 9y ago
I don't doubt SF, etc., is worse. My experience suggests Austin is a step down from where I lived previously. Perhaps you're more attractive or patient than I am. I also just realized that I forgot to mention that I'm a teetotaler, which seem to be a major turnoff to people here. If you don't mind me asking, how do you meet single women here?

starwind0 9y ago

I've had no shortage of suiters. Granted I say that as a single dude, but I know a few who would date me. MANY more times that of Denver. Just because I know more people because everyone is so friendly. I mean there is a whole university to offset from the software engineers.

throwaway_woxx7 9y ago
Maybe age is part of the problem for me. I'm about 10 years older than the undergrads, so they're not really in my dating pool. Most of the dates I've gone on were with fellow graduate students, but I didn't go on many dates before stopping.
- tropo 9y ago
  The ancient philosopher Plato tells us that the ideal marriage ages are 16 for women and 30 for men. One might suspect that he was 30 at the time, but Plato is quite respected. Consider taking his advice. Biologically it makes sense, leading to large families that can be financially supported.
  - reducesuffering 9y ago
    Consider taking his advice and marrying 16 year olds?
    - mrkstu 9y ago
      I think he's just implying that there isn't any reason to remove the undergrads from the dating pool.
- antisthenes 9y ago
  If anything, the undergrads should be your only dating pool. Older women come with too many entitlements and strings attached and you're essentially on the clock to start a family with them.

fapjacks 9y ago

Well, there is a big difference between "Austinites" and people that moved to Austin from somewhere else and now make up 4/5ths of the population. I made up that number, but it's not a bad guess. Austin is an east coast city in Texas. Everybody there is from LA or the east coast and brought their road rage and terrible attitudes to Austin. It seems all the actual Austinites are leaving the city for nearby small towns like Dripping Springs, Elgin, Fredricksburg, San Marcos, New Braunsfels, etc. People actually from Austin seem to be way cooler than the people that moved to Austin from somewhere else. No offense to the transplants -- I used to be one and certainly Austinites are way cooler than I am. But I'm guessing they've also looked around and come to the same conclusion like the person here. Austin was probably as cool as they say in the 80s and 90s. Not so much these days.

Recoveringhobo 9y ago
> Well, there is a big difference between "Austinites" and people that moved to Austin from somewhere else and now make up 4/5ths of the population. I made up that number, but it's not a bad guess. Austin is an east coast city in Texas. You could say the same thing about SF, Oakland, Portland, LA, Seattle, Boston, New York, etc etc. Name a city with a booming economy in the U.S. that isn't mostly transplants. > Everybody there is from LA or the east coast and brought their road rage and terrible attitudes to Austin. It seems all the actual Austinites are leaving the city for nearby small towns like Dripping Springs, Elgin, Fredricksburg, San Marcos, New Braunsfels, etc. Once again, you could say the same thing about any of the popular cities for young people to move to. I currently live in Seattle and hear people saying the exact same thing all the time. Californians pricing Seattlites out and bringing road rage yada yada. I'm originally from the East Bay and have experienced the exact same gentrification process in my own home town. > People actually from Austin seem to be way cooler than the people that moved to Austin from somewhere else. No offense to the transplants -- I used to be one and certainly Austinites are way cooler than I am. But I'm guessing they've also looked around and come to the same conclusion like the person here. Austin was probably as cool as they say in the 80s and 90s. Not so much these days. I've heard this exact same sentiment online about all the hip cities in the U.S.
- 9y ago