4 ms·

> No one talks to anyone from other companies, to the point of awkwardness. Can you share what part of the US/world you are in? I'm curious if this is cultural

> No one talks to anyone from other companies, to the point of awkwardness. Can you share what part of the US/world you are in? I'm curious if this is cultural.

LandR 9y ago
I'm in the UK (Scotland)
uhtred 9y ago
I'd probably be guilty of this, but it's not because I am rude or anti-social (I love talking to people one on one or in very small groups), I am just socially anxious and struggle to talk to people in an open office environment where a "private" conversation is really a conversation with everyone in the room. Could be the same reason some people don't talk in a shared kitchen that is in the middle of a shared office! My idea of hell.
- usrusr 9y ago
  Add to this that everybody there would fall into the uneasy middle ground of being too close for the idle pleasantries reserved for random strangers and too distant and unpredictable to get attached to.
- isostatic 9y ago
  A few weeks ago I was abroad with a group of people from my company, I knew 3 of the 10 others. We went out to dinner - Awful time, very stressful. Later in the week it had dropped to 3 other people, only 1 whom I knew, far better. (The other nights I had room service - that's the best situation, I can actually relax) That said, I'm happy to Make grunting noises and guesticulatr at milk bottles to the occasional stranger in a shared office kitchen. I guess part of the problem is it takes me a long time to remember a person's face - when watching tv I rely a lot on context. My wife often says "no that's not xxx, he's got the wrong colour hair". I've been known to get skin colour and sex wrong too, but most of the time context works. Took me about 2 seasons to remember the names of the 6 main characters in "friends". When making tea, there's no context to build on. At university I wrote down names of people on my floor in halls, which mostly helped. At school I'd learnt the names of everyone in the class by the middle of the second year, and by year 6 knew about 80% of the c. 120 people in the year group. My children's friends are mostly a blur but I can get 4 or 5 of them with a little confidence - that's after 16 months. In person conversations are far too draining, especially without context, and when there's nothing to gain what's the point?
Retra 9y ago
Whatever answer you get, the best you're going to do with it is confirmation bias. Nowhere in the US is the culture so homogeneous that you won't find the opposite behavior down the street.

> No one talks to anyone from other companies, to the point of awkwardness. Can you share what part of the US/world you are in? I'm curious if this is cultural.

LandR 9y ago

I'm in the UK (Scotland)

uhtred 9y ago

I'd probably be guilty of this, but it's not because I am rude or anti-social (I love talking to people one on one or in very small groups), I am just socially anxious and struggle to talk to people in an open office environment where a "private" conversation is really a conversation with everyone in the room. Could be the same reason some people don't talk in a shared kitchen that is in the middle of a shared office! My idea of hell.

usrusr 9y ago
Add to this that everybody there would fall into the uneasy middle ground of being too close for the idle pleasantries reserved for random strangers and too distant and unpredictable to get attached to.
isostatic 9y ago
A few weeks ago I was abroad with a group of people from my company, I knew 3 of the 10 others. We went out to dinner - Awful time, very stressful. Later in the week it had dropped to 3 other people, only 1 whom I knew, far better. (The other nights I had room service - that's the best situation, I can actually relax) That said, I'm happy to Make grunting noises and guesticulatr at milk bottles to the occasional stranger in a shared office kitchen. I guess part of the problem is it takes me a long time to remember a person's face - when watching tv I rely a lot on context. My wife often says "no that's not xxx, he's got the wrong colour hair". I've been known to get skin colour and sex wrong too, but most of the time context works. Took me about 2 seasons to remember the names of the 6 main characters in "friends". When making tea, there's no context to build on. At university I wrote down names of people on my floor in halls, which mostly helped. At school I'd learnt the names of everyone in the class by the middle of the second year, and by year 6 knew about 80% of the c. 120 people in the year group. My children's friends are mostly a blur but I can get 4 or 5 of them with a little confidence - that's after 16 months. In person conversations are far too draining, especially without context, and when there's nothing to gain what's the point?

Retra 9y ago

Whatever answer you get, the best you're going to do with it is confirmation bias. Nowhere in the US is the culture so homogeneous that you won't find the opposite behavior down the street.