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If you are expecting or planning to have a child, don't join a startup. Startups take a huge amount of time by their nature, and that is time you should be spen

If you are expecting or planning to have a child, don't join a startup. Startups take a huge amount of time by their nature, and that is time you should be spending with your spouse & child. I know this sounds harsh, but I made this call myself and don't regret it at all. If you haven't worked in a larger company with more generous benefits/time off policies vs small startups, you might not understand how much higher your new family's quality of life will be.

fizzledbits 9y ago
CEO of the startup I worked at had a child early in the process, and it was indeed incredibly hard for them individuallly and strained the marriage. After a few years of struggle, the startup was acquired, which was followed by a few years of comparatively relaxed (golden-handcuffed) work at the company that bought us. It paid for a new house that fit their family in an area with one of the best school systems in the country. I’m certain that he and his wife don’t regret it. He had worked for big companies before, had an insight about the industry he could bet on, so it was his maybe best shot at fulfilling a NEED to build a new company like his heroes did. It happened to ‘succeed’ in the financial sense, but his wife gets it either way, and his kid will benefit from growing up with confident, driven, risk-taking people as parents. It’s hard for me to understand how most people in this thread, who I presume are super rigorous regarding their degrees of uncertainty about various things at work, have a clear answer for what everyone else should do in some barely specified situation.
- throwaway5752 9y ago
  You understand of course that 1) that you're talking about the CEO and 2) it was a successful acquisition. I get your point, and different strokes for different folks. I'll stand by what I said as being generally correct.
roguecoder 9y ago
Not every startup is that way, as this post highlights, and there are plenty of big companies that will pressure fathers to be back at work the next week too. "Be selective about where you work" seems like better advice.

fizzledbits 9y ago

CEO of the startup I worked at had a child early in the process, and it was indeed incredibly hard for them individuallly and strained the marriage. After a few years of struggle, the startup was acquired, which was followed by a few years of comparatively relaxed (golden-handcuffed) work at the company that bought us. It paid for a new house that fit their family in an area with one of the best school systems in the country. I’m certain that he and his wife don’t regret it. He had worked for big companies before, had an insight about the industry he could bet on, so it was his maybe best shot at fulfilling a NEED to build a new company like his heroes did. It happened to ‘succeed’ in the financial sense, but his wife gets it either way, and his kid will benefit from growing up with confident, driven, risk-taking people as parents. It’s hard for me to understand how most people in this thread, who I presume are super rigorous regarding their degrees of uncertainty about various things at work, have a clear answer for what everyone else should do in some barely specified situation.

throwaway5752 9y ago
You understand of course that 1) that you're talking about the CEO and 2) it was a successful acquisition. I get your point, and different strokes for different folks. I'll stand by what I said as being generally correct.

roguecoder 9y ago

Not every startup is that way, as this post highlights, and there are plenty of big companies that will pressure fathers to be back at work the next week too. "Be selective about where you work" seems like better advice.