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Dale Carnegie, How to win friends and influence people. The book had opened my mind on how people react to criticism. Human Relationships, Steve Duck. Relati

by alok-g 9y ago

Dale Carnegie, How to win friends and influence people. The book had opened my mind on how people react to criticism. Human Relationships, Steve Duck. Relationships are so important in life, and not at all obvious for everyone, yet we are all left to ourselves on them.

singularity2001 9y ago
I wish I could live more by the insights of this book. also given its content the real title should be "How to win friends and manipulate people."
- fdw 9y ago
  While it is certainly true on some level, I think Carnegie chose not to use "manipulate" for a reason: It's not so much about getting them to do what you want, but to see the issue from all sides and choose a path that is beneficial to you both. He also repeatedly stresses honesty ("honest appreciation"). So even if there is some amount of manipulation, it's still mainly about seeing everybody as a person and working together.
- MegaLeon 9y ago
  Here's a chart I found useful for translating the precepts of the book into a more actionable form: https://labs.thesocietea.org/carnegie-chart/ https://labs.thesocietea.org/carnegie-chart/
- karlbooklover 9y ago
  The book the 48 laws of power is about manipulation which I don't like. I consider Carnegie's book, The 7 habits of highly effective people excellent books to learn how to help other people through win-win situations.
AlexAmee 9y ago
From my standpoint, this is one of the most overrated books of all times. I stopped reading it somewhere in the middle because it did not tell me anything new at all. I understand we are all different and have our strengths and weaknesses, what is totally obvious to you is probably a new concept to me.
- reboog711 9y ago
  Which book are referring to? Human Relationships or the Dale Carnegie book?
  - AlexAmee 9y ago
    Dale Carnegie
- fdw 9y ago
  I agree that most of the advice is pretty obvious if you reflect on your and other people's behavior. Also, I grew pretty tired of always using a string of anecdotes as support. Sometimes they don't even seem to fit the current chapter. However, I think the important point of the book is that Carnegie succinctly collects a small number of behaviors that will improve your social life if you apply them. So you might not learn something new in the book, but hopefully it will teach you to focus on these known things instead.
- yesenadam 9y ago
  "Most overrated" - means that you've heard from a lot of people who liked it a lot more than you, got a lot out of it. I read a lot of movie user reviews on IMDb, and often people rant angrily about incredibly overrated movies, with the impression they're saying something about the movie and not about themselves. Maybe they feel smarter or better than the people who liked it. As if not being able to appreciate something is a virtue. Anyway, why try to stop people reading a book millions have learnt something from?
  - AlexAmee 9y ago
    > Anyway, why try to stop people reading a book millions have learnt something from? That was not my intention, to stop someone from reading it. I explicitly said that: > I understand we are all different and have our strengths and weaknesses, what is totally obvious to you is probably a new concept to me.
    - yesenadam 9y ago

by alok-g 9y ago

singularity2001 9y ago

I wish I could live more by the insights of this book. also given its content the real title should be "How to win friends and manipulate people."

fdw 9y ago
While it is certainly true on some level, I think Carnegie chose not to use "manipulate" for a reason: It's not so much about getting them to do what you want, but to see the issue from all sides and choose a path that is beneficial to you both. He also repeatedly stresses honesty ("honest appreciation"). So even if there is some amount of manipulation, it's still mainly about seeing everybody as a person and working together.
MegaLeon 9y ago
Here's a chart I found useful for translating the precepts of the book into a more actionable form: https://labs.thesocietea.org/carnegie-chart/ https://labs.thesocietea.org/carnegie-chart/
karlbooklover 9y ago
The book the 48 laws of power is about manipulation which I don't like. I consider Carnegie's book, The 7 habits of highly effective people excellent books to learn how to help other people through win-win situations.

AlexAmee 9y ago

From my standpoint, this is one of the most overrated books of all times. I stopped reading it somewhere in the middle because it did not tell me anything new at all. I understand we are all different and have our strengths and weaknesses, what is totally obvious to you is probably a new concept to me.

reboog711 9y ago
Which book are referring to? Human Relationships or the Dale Carnegie book?
- AlexAmee 9y ago
  Dale Carnegie
fdw 9y ago
I agree that most of the advice is pretty obvious if you reflect on your and other people's behavior. Also, I grew pretty tired of always using a string of anecdotes as support. Sometimes they don't even seem to fit the current chapter. However, I think the important point of the book is that Carnegie succinctly collects a small number of behaviors that will improve your social life if you apply them. So you might not learn something new in the book, but hopefully it will teach you to focus on these known things instead.
yesenadam 9y ago
"Most overrated" - means that you've heard from a lot of people who liked it a lot more than you, got a lot out of it. I read a lot of movie user reviews on IMDb, and often people rant angrily about incredibly overrated movies, with the impression they're saying something about the movie and not about themselves. Maybe they feel smarter or better than the people who liked it. As if not being able to appreciate something is a virtue. Anyway, why try to stop people reading a book millions have learnt something from?
- AlexAmee 9y ago
  > Anyway, why try to stop people reading a book millions have learnt something from? That was not my intention, to stop someone from reading it. I explicitly said that: > I understand we are all different and have our strengths and weaknesses, what is totally obvious to you is probably a new concept to me.
  - yesenadam 9y ago