5 ms·

Reminds me of this documentary about Sweden. 50% of Swedes live alone, and 25% die alone. Often it takes a long time for someone to notice, as pensions come in

Reminds me of this documentary about Sweden. 50% of Swedes live alone, and 25% die alone. Often it takes a long time for someone to notice, as pensions come in to the account automatically, and the rent is also paid automatically. https://www.svtplay.se/video/10458343/the-swedish-theory-of-love/dox-the-swedish-theory-of-love-avsnitt-1 https://www.svtplay.se/video/10458343/the-swedish-theory-of-...

e40 9y ago
This is why my mother sends me an email every morning. Sometimes she just says hey, but most other times she includes other info about her life or asks me questions. Her reasoning was that because she had a cat (at the time), she didn't want to become cat food should she died suddenly.
- eric_h 9y ago
  > she didn't want to become cat food should she died suddenly. I had a great-great aunt who lived alone and hoarded cats and dogs (and many other non-living things). She was partially eaten when they finally found her. My grandparents eventually moved in to that property, and now my parents have it as a second property. Every time I visit, I still get a little shudder when I think about what it must have been like to stumble upon that scene (a weeks dead, partially eaten corpse surrounded by dozens of hungry cats and dogs...) - I'm not sure which neighbor discovered her, but that poor person... [Edit: fortunately, my parents didn't tell me the story until I was 18, I had visited my grandparents at that property every summer for most of my childhood. I imagine if they had told me earlier, my trips to the basement of that 19th century house would have been a bit more frightening]
  - wil421 9y ago
    I’ve heard similar stories and seen it mentioned on cop show. It must be pretty common. What about a device like the emergency buttons for elderly but it checks vitals? It could update loved ones daily. I bet you could use an Apple Watch.
    - eric_h 9y ago
      I really hope I don’t have to worry about it for another 10-20 years
- rokhayakebe 9y ago
  Off Topic: This is why my mother sends me an email every morning. Should be the other way around. Parents watched us every hour when growing up, as adults we should be the ones checking on them constantly. In the West I rarely hear people who talk about their parents with great love and care. Instead I see parents praising their children all day long. These kids grow up feeling like a prize and they do not develop enough appreciation for the hard work it took their parents. Growing up in Africa it felt like, as a child, you owed everything to your parents and they did you a favor taking care of you. While extreme, in the long run people take care of their parents and you will not hear of older people being alone let alone die alone.
  - DoreenMichele 9y ago
    It doesn't really matter if mom initiates the email exchange or child does. The important detail is daily communication from the elderly parent confirming they are alive and functional. If child sends email, the elderly parent still needs to reply or you have no mechanism to check if they are okay.
    - coldtea 9y ago
      The point was not about the mechanism, but caring.
  - hbt 9y ago
    in the West, children are delegated to third parties (often strangers, not family) Several government programs act as a poor substitute for family support. Lack of incentive, lack of community and an emphasis on individualism creates people like that.
  - mattashii 9y ago
    Though my opinion may be extreme, I only think of family as a group of people/dear friends who I've grown up around, and parents as caretakers. Yes, I do own them for taking care of me (which I know was a pain), but they are also the ones who chose to do so, without my consent. Should I be grateful to people who force their values on me? I think not. At least, not so much as for them to completely rely on me when they're unfit for society.

e40 9y ago

This is why my mother sends me an email every morning. Sometimes she just says hey, but most other times she includes other info about her life or asks me questions. Her reasoning was that because she had a cat (at the time), she didn't want to become cat food should she died suddenly.

eric_h 9y ago
> she didn't want to become cat food should she died suddenly. I had a great-great aunt who lived alone and hoarded cats and dogs (and many other non-living things). She was partially eaten when they finally found her. My grandparents eventually moved in to that property, and now my parents have it as a second property. Every time I visit, I still get a little shudder when I think about what it must have been like to stumble upon that scene (a weeks dead, partially eaten corpse surrounded by dozens of hungry cats and dogs...) - I'm not sure which neighbor discovered her, but that poor person... [Edit: fortunately, my parents didn't tell me the story until I was 18, I had visited my grandparents at that property every summer for most of my childhood. I imagine if they had told me earlier, my trips to the basement of that 19th century house would have been a bit more frightening]
- wil421 9y ago
  I’ve heard similar stories and seen it mentioned on cop show. It must be pretty common. What about a device like the emergency buttons for elderly but it checks vitals? It could update loved ones daily. I bet you could use an Apple Watch.
  - eric_h 9y ago
    I really hope I don’t have to worry about it for another 10-20 years
rokhayakebe 9y ago
Off Topic: This is why my mother sends me an email every morning. Should be the other way around. Parents watched us every hour when growing up, as adults we should be the ones checking on them constantly. In the West I rarely hear people who talk about their parents with great love and care. Instead I see parents praising their children all day long. These kids grow up feeling like a prize and they do not develop enough appreciation for the hard work it took their parents. Growing up in Africa it felt like, as a child, you owed everything to your parents and they did you a favor taking care of you. While extreme, in the long run people take care of their parents and you will not hear of older people being alone let alone die alone.
- DoreenMichele 9y ago
  It doesn't really matter if mom initiates the email exchange or child does. The important detail is daily communication from the elderly parent confirming they are alive and functional. If child sends email, the elderly parent still needs to reply or you have no mechanism to check if they are okay.
  - coldtea 9y ago
    The point was not about the mechanism, but caring.
- hbt 9y ago
  in the West, children are delegated to third parties (often strangers, not family) Several government programs act as a poor substitute for family support. Lack of incentive, lack of community and an emphasis on individualism creates people like that.
- mattashii 9y ago
  Though my opinion may be extreme, I only think of family as a group of people/dear friends who I've grown up around, and parents as caretakers. Yes, I do own them for taking care of me (which I know was a pain), but they are also the ones who chose to do so, without my consent. Should I be grateful to people who force their values on me? I think not. At least, not so much as for them to completely rely on me when they're unfit for society.