4 ms·

I don't know my exact position on the curve, but I can relate. I find it ironic that many of the folks who score pretty high on general intelligence, often hav

by zafka 9y ago

I don't know my exact position on the curve, but I can relate. I find it ironic that many of the folks who score pretty high on general intelligence, often have an issue with social intelligence. I spend a lot of time now trying to study human nature in a game of catch-up. What most people seem to learn instinctively, I need to study.

no_wave 9y ago
What's the irony, really... there's probably a reason innate IQ settled around where it did over the thousands of years since civilization started and not higher.
HumanDrivenDev 9y ago
> What most people seem to learn instinctively, I need to study. I'm curious what part of being socially intelligent you had to learn. Any examples?
- zafka 9y ago
  One of the better study guides I found was Charlie Munger's book : "Poor Charlies Almanac" One of the things i also found very enlightening was that people often believe people who talk very fast, even after they have been wrong quite a bit.
Jimpulse 9y ago
It may not necessarily be an innate issue with their social intelligence, but more so a learned reaction. Getting singled out by something as important as speech as a child could have lasting ramifications. Having to constantly weigh your words in stressful social situations sounds like a surefire way to develop social anxiety.
ModernMech 9y ago
> What most people seem to learn instinctively, I need to study. This is 100% my wife vs me. I had heard about EQ before I met her, but I never really witnessed the power of a high EQ in action until we started dating. She knew so much about me by reading my face, reactions, gestures, etc. it sometimes made me angry, like she was in my head or something. I watched as she predicted people's actions easily, or convinced people to do what she wanted just by talking to them a particular way. She really opened my eyes to the idea that maybe having a high EQ is more beneficial than a high IQ, at least in navigating life. I always considered it something people said they had because they knew they weren't smart (side note, my wife also has a high IQ, so if you're reading this honey, yes I know you're smarter than me too.)
- zafka 9y ago
  Hee, THe last line makes me think you are finally catching on also.

by zafka 9y ago

no_wave 9y ago

What's the irony, really... there's probably a reason innate IQ settled around where it did over the thousands of years since civilization started and not higher.

HumanDrivenDev 9y ago

> What most people seem to learn instinctively, I need to study. I'm curious what part of being socially intelligent you had to learn. Any examples?

zafka 9y ago
One of the better study guides I found was Charlie Munger's book : "Poor Charlies Almanac" One of the things i also found very enlightening was that people often believe people who talk very fast, even after they have been wrong quite a bit.

Jimpulse 9y ago

It may not necessarily be an innate issue with their social intelligence, but more so a learned reaction. Getting singled out by something as important as speech as a child could have lasting ramifications. Having to constantly weigh your words in stressful social situations sounds like a surefire way to develop social anxiety.

ModernMech 9y ago

> What most people seem to learn instinctively, I need to study. This is 100% my wife vs me. I had heard about EQ before I met her, but I never really witnessed the power of a high EQ in action until we started dating. She knew so much about me by reading my face, reactions, gestures, etc. it sometimes made me angry, like she was in my head or something. I watched as she predicted people's actions easily, or convinced people to do what she wanted just by talking to them a particular way. She really opened my eyes to the idea that maybe having a high EQ is more beneficial than a high IQ, at least in navigating life. I always considered it something people said they had because they knew they weren't smart (side note, my wife also has a high IQ, so if you're reading this honey, yes I know you're smarter than me too.)

zafka 9y ago
Hee, THe last line makes me think you are finally catching on also.