So you gave up science and searching for truth, for manipulating people/lying to them (I guess by "telling people what they want to hear" you don't mean the tru

So you gave up science and searching for truth, for manipulating people/lying to them (I guess by "telling people what they want to hear" you don't mean the truth) and self-promotion? Sigh. More to be gained? What's more important in life, what you give or what you get? We make a living by what we get, but a life by what we give. Sounds like some kind of category mistake, or a few. Science isn't as totally impossible as you make out. Evidently. It sounds a little like the crises ex-christians have about the world, dizzying and demoralizing themselves with similar grandiose dramatics. (existentialists, Bergman etc) That biochemistry crisis sounds like a Zeno's paradox, stultifying oneself with the abyss of the infinite. "There was no way he could ever know which theory was right" - isn't that absurd exaggeration? But sure, I guess you mean, you realized a life of science wouldn't perhaps be a wonderful bountiful one, but a hard, thankless one, maybe ending in total failure. But why blame science or philosophy if science doesn't guarantee you a pleasant life? Or to be beloved. Well, maybe it's only for the cantankerous few, those mountain goats crazy enough to love the solitary labour (in science, philosophy, mathematics etc) for its own sake. And it's good to realize such a life wasn't for you. In the sequel Lila (although not sure if recommending Pirsig to people is a good idea) there's a lot against academic anthropology, but even more presenting what he evidently sees as objectively how the world works, (societies, cultures, people) what could be called sociology I guess. And it's very interesting and insightful stuff. Ok sorry about that ramble. To this day, my whole philosophy totters after an hour’s sympathetic conversation with total strangers: it seems so foolish to me to wish to be right at the price of love, and not be able to communicate what one considers most valuable lest one destroy the sympathy. – Nietzsche, letter to Gast, 1880