4 ms·

Is there anything wrong with waiting to have sex with someone you're invested in? I've found those types of experiences to be worth it, long-term. It's interest

Is there anything wrong with waiting to have sex with someone you're invested in? I've found those types of experiences to be worth it, long-term. It's interesting that some see that as naive--it's the opposite if anything. Easy sex is fun but it would seem hard to invest in anyone but myself.

qubex 9y ago
Yup, I’m being savagely down-voted for voicing my opinion... apparently by people who embrace the shallowness that’s the hallmark of consumerism extended all the way into the realm of our social experiences, making us mutual fungible products to each other.
icebraining 9y ago
Why would investing in someone but yourself require giving up sex with others? That dichotomy between the unattached bachelor and the loving monogamous spouse seems to be just another of those taboos.
- deleted 9y ago
  [deleted]
- ikeyany 9y ago
  You're not required to "give up sex with others" if you don't want to. Hell, many people are okay with polyamory or casual sex in general. I was merely stating that committing sexually can in fact be a good thing, and that the parent comment cannot speak for everyone.
- andai 9y ago
  Wat?
- coldtea 9y ago
  >Why would investing in someone but yourself require giving up sex with others? Because more often than not that someone you've invested in is hurt by your casual sex with others. Why would be compartmentalizing the casual sex more "rational" than not?
- kahnpro 9y ago
  Jealousy is a very real human emotion.
BjoernKW 9y ago
I'd say it depends on if it's truly what you want or if it's something that society wants from you. Too often these ideas are societal norms rather than our own opinions. Notions like "waiting for Prince Charming" or the one things like purity rings are a symptom of in my opinion are indeed naive and against human nature.
- ikeyany 9y ago
  I'm all for encouraging people to be honest with themselves, even if that honesty leads them to ugly places. But we are talking strictly about the ability to have fulfilling monogamous relationships, not the validity of "prince Charming" narratives or purity rings.

qubex 9y ago

Yup, I’m being savagely down-voted for voicing my opinion... apparently by people who embrace the shallowness that’s the hallmark of consumerism extended all the way into the realm of our social experiences, making us mutual fungible products to each other.

icebraining 9y ago

Why would investing in someone but yourself require giving up sex with others? That dichotomy between the unattached bachelor and the loving monogamous spouse seems to be just another of those taboos.

deleted 9y ago
[deleted]
ikeyany 9y ago
You're not required to "give up sex with others" if you don't want to. Hell, many people are okay with polyamory or casual sex in general. I was merely stating that committing sexually can in fact be a good thing, and that the parent comment cannot speak for everyone.
andai 9y ago
Wat?
coldtea 9y ago
>Why would investing in someone but yourself require giving up sex with others? Because more often than not that someone you've invested in is hurt by your casual sex with others. Why would be compartmentalizing the casual sex more "rational" than not?
kahnpro 9y ago
Jealousy is a very real human emotion.

BjoernKW 9y ago

I'd say it depends on if it's truly what you want or if it's something that society wants from you. Too often these ideas are societal norms rather than our own opinions. Notions like "waiting for Prince Charming" or the one things like purity rings are a symptom of in my opinion are indeed naive and against human nature.

ikeyany 9y ago
I'm all for encouraging people to be honest with themselves, even if that honesty leads them to ugly places. But we are talking strictly about the ability to have fulfilling monogamous relationships, not the validity of "prince Charming" narratives or purity rings.